I am an American living in South Korea as a teacher. I have been talking to a male Korean friend online, strictly language exchange and sharing cultural differences, etc. although there is a Korean guy in which I am interested. My friend, however, said that Korean men think Western women are all easy and that they have sexual fantasies about us and that I should be super careful if Korean men approach me because they will expect certain things from me and they can be dangerous.
I don’t just believe every aspect of this as the total truth about the danger and the fantasies, and am not someone to overgeneralize! …But regarding the idea of us being easy I am wondering if you have any advice/opinion on how widespread this idea is, I don’t want to generalize, but I wish I could have some idea as to whether or not this really is the majority of thinking around here? It makes me so sad, I am not easy! Thanks for your time.
We can only tell you about our personal experience.
My experience is only with Kimchi Man, and it’s simple: If he thought I was easy at any point in our acquaintanceship he would not consider a long term relationship with me. So I truly believe him when he says he never thought white women are easy.
Now, his experience is much more extensive, since his friends are Korean men, his coworkers are Korean men, his university buddies are Korean men, and he was locked up in very cramped space for two years with lots and lots of Korean men during military service. He says most of the men he knew didn’t have that kind of opinion. But he assures you if you did come across such a Korean men, he wouldn’t hide his attitude about white women from you and would very soon and openly let you know what he expects.
Actually, it’s not the guy you are interested in that worries me, but your friend. Why would he tell you such a thing and make you feel bad and unwelcome? Does he have some hidden motives? It just seems a strange thing to tell to a friend.
One cautious tip about cultural difference, though. Korean women wear extra short skirts and shorts, but are very adamant about covering their cleavage.
You should wear whatever makes you happy, and no one should judge you for it, not even in Korea. However, since you say it makes you sad, in the beginning you might avoid open shirts.
I assure you when you meet the right guy he will make you feel relaxed and comfortable no matter what you wear and you will forget you ever worried about impression you leave on Koreans. I say this from personal experience. And I’m from Europe, we’re all half-naked here in the summer. ^^
As far as danger goes, Korean men are no more or less dangerous than other men in the world. Use the same caution you did around strangers in America.
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