About Loving Korean

Welcome to Loving Korean. A site written by Oegukeen and helped greatly by Kimchi Man. Check out info about Korean men, Korean tutorials, as well as answers we have given for the most popular of over 200 questions our curious readers have submitted so far.
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My Korean boyfriend was born and raised in South Korea and I was born and raised in Europe. As I tried to prepare for the difficult journey ahead – with almost 6,000 miles (around 10 000 km) of distance between our countries and expecting culture clashes, misunderstandings and language barriers – I turned to guidance online by people who had already gone through what still lay ahead for me. To my great surprise, information was either scarce or worryingly negative. Still, we didn’t even consider giving up and meeting each other in person became the most important thing in our lives.And then…

I met my Korean boyfriend

dating Korean guys love South Korean manThat night everything that could have gone wrong went wrong. My carefully perfected plan was ruined. After taking 6 hours to get there it turned out the place where I wanted to get the food had been closed for a year, the bus didn’t show up, I spent all the money on a cab fare and, on the day when it was crucial I look my best, I looked exhausted and defeated.

This late at night the airport was in semi-darkness and looked deserted. The time seemed to have both slowed down and sped up. I wanted it to pass, and yet, I wasn’t ready. Slowly, a few people gathered. Among them I saw a few black-haired heads. Asians! That was a good sign.

Finally, the gates opened and people started pouring out. And then… I saw him! I had no trouble recognizing him. After all, I haven’t done much else than stare at his photos for the last few months. He was weaving among people, and every few seconds, I would lose sight of him. He grabbed his suitcase and headed… straight towards me!

Yesterday we were thousands of kilometers apart. Now we were so close we could have touched each other. Could have, had it not been for a huge glass pane dividing the arrivals from people ready to greet them. I motioned towards the doors. Before I knew what had happened I was awkwardly hugging him. I had played this hug in my head hundreds of times. Somehow in my mind I always did it much more gracefully. But then again in my mind he didn’t have that huge backpack on.

Dazed, we both made it out, murmuring, trying to make a conversation, our hearts pounding. In the meantime the missing bus magically appeared and we settled in the seats next to each other.

For the first time I looked at him. Really looked at him. It was my boyfriend. My Korean boyfriend. My Korean boyfriend who I was seeing in person for the first time in my life. My eyes slid from his face along his arms. Muscular arms. Down to his hands resting in his lap. There was that watch, the silver watch I would recognize in an instant because it was on every photo of him I have seen. And his hands were just as manly and beautiful as in the photos.

“Is this what you want?”

I looked up to see him smiling at me. My eyes went down again to his hand but this time it wasn’t resting in his lap. It was outstreched, palm-upward, ready for me to hold it. Big smile settled in on my face as our hands wrapped around each other.

Actually, nothing had gone wrong that night.

Korean boyfriend foreign girlfriend Loving Korean

We’ve been through a lot, both together and now apart, but not for a moment did either of us regret it.

If you have a Korean guy you like, or if you are already in a relationship with one, we are happy to have been able to share our experiences and tell you what we have learned, but we would also love to hear any tips that you might have .

Don’t miss our newest answers and other goodies we publish – get prompt notifications in your inbox with “Follow via Email” function in the sidebar. We don’t publish often, so we won’t flood your inbox.

345 thoughts on “About Loving Korean

    • Of course, we have many :) I am especially obsessed with taking photos when the time for him to return to Korea is drawing near.

      But we prefer to keep our anonymity and we don’t want to turn this into a blog about us. We would like it more to be a community for everyone who loves or dates a Korean man :)

      P.S. My profile photo is a photo of us together ^^ The left hand is his, the right one is mine.

  1. Thank you for this~ :)
    I followed the blog over from Soompi~
    I too am in a relationship with a (native) Korean man, and like you, was extremely worried after reading the information available online. Come to find out, Korean men are not limited to being either aggressive and controlling or girly. Go figure!

    Hopefully your blog will help to remedy these generalizations. There is so much to Korean culture, and while culture is a huge part of who people are, it doesn’t dictate every part of a person (although different cultures certainly make things fun! ^^). Korean men are always going to be men first. They’re humans too.

    • Welcome! We are really happy you came here. We hope you will find something fun to read. Also feel free to give tips and share your experience.

      You are completely right, many unfair things are being said around the web about dating Korean men. But you will see that everyone who made comments here is friendly and nice :) We feel very lucky.

      The atmosphere at Soompi has been somewhat hostile, but we are happy you still decided it was worth to click.

  2. I know without a doubt that I found the right Korean man for me! When we talk face to face we’re all smiles and worries of the world slip away. It’s been about a week since we saw each other last but I decided to make a move via Facebook. We have several interests in common and I think we just clicked when we met a few months ago. I’m anxiously awaiting a reply and I’m so excited! I love this blog and thanks for having it here!

    • Welcome! It is wonderful to have you join our little community (or maybe not so little? :) ). Good luck with your Korean guy. We hope he gives you the answer you are wishing for.

      • Thanks! I will definitely post what happens! Even though I’m American and he’s Korean and an age difference, I truly believe it’s meant to be! It’s a blessing from God and I’m treating it as that :D

      • Also, do you know if dating and relationships in S. Korean culture are different in different regions of the country?

        • Dating and relationships are even barely different between Korean and Europe. Kimchi Man says there are some stereotypes about Korean men and women from different regions of Korea, but those are just stereotypes and not true differences.

  3. 안녕~~
    I’m Indonesian woman in my twenties, I’m dating with a Korean man in his thirties since January 2012 and I was worried after reading the information about korean men’s bad habit, but I believe in him, his hug can make me feel safe, his smile can make me happy and I know He is love me.

    • We are pleased that you are happy. :) Korean people are like any other people in the world – there are the good ones and there are the bad ones. We hope your Korean boyfriend is one of the good ones. ^^

  4. Hi! I’m glad I found this blog! ^_^ I am in secondary school, so quite young and obviously not looking for a relationship yet :) but I would like to eventually marry a Korean man, in Korea ^_^ Do you think it is possible for me to find a Korean man who would want to be with me, not just for ‘experience’? Thank you! ^_^

    • As you can see there are plenty of women here, myself included, who have serious relationships with Korean men.

      But you are still young, don’t worry, I am sure things will change even more by the time you decide to get married, and surely you will change as well. You may be surprised to find yourself wanting different things than you do now.

  5. Hi Oegukeen, in response to your question, I have to admit that my relationship with my Oppa is uncertain. As you know, we met in college, as he came to the US to study. In order to stay, he needs a visa–preferably a work visa. But now he’s back in Korea because of this issue, & all we can do is pray that we’ll be able to meet again. I plan on visiting Korea next year for vacation, but still we are uncertain about our path together & the future. But marriage is not our solution, if anyone asks. We just keep our hopes high & pray…. I hope you get to see Kimchi Man soon^-^

    • I know it may seem hopeless at times, but don’t give up! Visas are crutial to being together but when love is strong everything can be solved. You may have to change your plans or find a different way, but the important thing is, there is always a way.

      My Korean boyfriend, Kimchi Man, and I can’t be together the way we wanted to but we are searching for alternatives and changing our expectations. It’s just too important to give up.

      Good luck!

  6. I’m Canadian, but I’ve lived in Korea for 7 years. It’s a great place. :) Also, you captured the feeling of waiting for someone come out of the arrival gate very well: the watching, waiting, the anticipation.

  7. So first of all I think your story is really cute!! I hope the same happens to me… I’m planning travel to Korea in January just for the hell of it. I added the university Facebook to mine and this Korean guy just randomly added me on Facebook… I accepted him and we have been talking quite a bit, we actually kinda of fall a sleep in the middle of our conversation because he is 15 hours ahead. How can you tell if a Korean guy likes you? Is texting during his university class a sign? How about texting till like 1 am? Any ideas as to how to proceed with the relationship? I want to become more but I’m afraid that he will think bad of me… He always replies to my messages but doesn’t seem to ask many question… Any way I would appreciate any advise!! Thanks :D

  8. Hi! I stumbled across this blog and I have to say thank you for taking the time to write about these topics! I’m a hispanic living in Florida, US and i’ve recently taken an interest in South Korean culture and history. It all started when my friend introduced me to a Korean drama and I was hooked. I’m glad she did because although I don’t watch the dramas as much anymore I have become increasingly intrigued with everything South Korea. I’m teaching myself Korean and trying to learn as much as I can about the country because I plan on studying abroad there once I graduate. Needless to say, it has stolen my heart :) I just wanted to ask about relationships between hispanics and koreans. I dream of living in South Korea but wonder if I will find the one there. I know it’s crazy to think I will fall in love there or that a South Korean guy will fall for me because of many factors but I find myself increasingly longing to visit and learn and sorround myself with South Korea. I have never jmet a Korean in my life, online or by mail or otherwise,

  9. you have a beautiful, inspiring story :) I wanted to ask, how did you two meet? Penpal site? How can I meet people and connect with them legitimately from across the globe?

  10. Hello again! I’ve opened an interpal account, so far have only gotten messages from africa and from here in the US. Still i’m hoping to meet some Koreans soon :) How did you go about meeting new people on the site??

    • I took the initiative. I carefully read many profiles and sent messages to many people. Just like in offline life if you just wait for things to happen to you, there are much slimmer chances that they actually will.

      And just like in offline life most people you meet will not be a good match for your personality, very few you will be able to have interesting conversations with, and even fewer will become friends. But it’s worth it. :)

      • That’s true, I’m not the kind of person that usually takes initiative when it comes to meeting new people but I’m guessing that I will have to start doing it if I want to meet new people on Interpals. I will try it, thanks!

  11. I’m just so glad I stumbled upon your blog! I just recently found myself in a 짝사랑 with a Korean guy and have spent quite some time googling some love advice and your blog is the best I’ve come across with. Thanks for putting this blog up and for sharing your advice, help and your own love story. Wishing both of you happiness forever!

  12. Aaaaaah, I love this kind of stories “)
    It should be a novel ^^
    You’re really a beautiful couple!
    I wish you a happy life together ..
    Thank you so much for create this blog, I found what I was search about!!

  13. hi, I would like to share with you something..wanna know if you experience it before? I knew a korean guy from interpals too. we are very good and close to each other..used to text using kakao talk, msn, skype, etc. we talked about many things…he even asked me before will I married him? do i really dont care his height since he is shorter than me? that day he told me that his mum ask me to visit korea this year if possible…and yes I can because I have long holidays…but he told me that he worries bout me and his mum cannot communicate because of language problem…then he told me he has to work in day time and he also worry if I stay at his home all the time, I will be bored…if I go out alone in winter, he is worry too…because is winter, very cold…he said only at night got 1 or 2 hours for me…so he said changed plan..he said he will come to my country next year if I cant go to Korea this year…he said is hard for him to get vacation since he is working in a new company…must work at least 2 years only can apply vacation…lately, he seem so cold towards me..always I am the one take the first move to text him in Kakaotalk…when he replied also very short or not even replied…so I feel like so confusing with his feelings…he ever talk about marriage with me…last few days, I sent him a korean song which I love very much, just to share and asked if he likes that song…but he replied me in korean words that he likes me…then, when I asked him is it you said to me you like me just now? then he seems wanna skip the topic or dont feel like admit what he said to me…I found that he is kind of cold to me lately…sometimes I am thinking are we possible to be together….anywhere, I am admired with what you and kimchi man had done…mind to tell me how old are both of you? I am 25 and the guy is 35….

    • No, I have not experienced that.

      Are you sure he told you that he likes you and not the song? It can be ambiguos in Korean language.
      Is it possible he is just very busy because he is working in a new company? Koreans work longest hours in OECD countries.
      Kimchi Man and I are both in our twenties, and he is a bit older than me.

  14. Cool, interesting site you have here I came across it from your youtube channel. I am korean and I’ve always been attracted physically to foreign women more so than korean women. but I am with a korean girl now. good luck to everyone looking for love whoever it may be. =). Oh and btw I find it interesting that you, being from europe, are better at english than most ppl in america =P

    • Thank you, I am happy you think it is interesting. Good luck with your girlfriend as well.

      You are too kind when judging my English. I sometimes feel sorry that I subject you all to my mistakes. If you ever notice a mistake, please do let me know!

      • Haha no, you’re english is great i am Korean-American =P. I’ve lived in america since i was 3 years old. I know when i see well spoken english =P. Oh and btw why did you take out the link to this site on youtube?

        • I don’t know what else to say but thank you! You have no idea how much trouble definite and indefinite articles give me. ;)

          I didn’t mean to remove it, I just tried to move it from the text to the links below it. That way it should be clickable and people don’t have to copy-paste. Is it not visible? I’ll put it back in the text as well, just in case. Thank you for letting me know.

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