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433 responses to “Ask us 2012 Archives”
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Hi oegukeen^^
Greetings from Singapore! i really enjoyed reading your blog and i also have a qn for you and kimchiman
i have learnt korean for sometime by myself and so can speak some basic conversational korean. Recently I met this korean guy thru one of my friends, and we have been contacting each other almost everyday.
He is two years older than me. just about four days after knowing each other,he said he gives me permission to speak informally with him. (basically speaking in 반말)
what Im just curious is that, i never knew that someone younger can speak in banmal to someone older? is this actually possible? Is there actually any significant meaning to it? he also said i could address him as Oppa.
all along i had thought that only the older/higher authority people can speak in banmal in appropriate situations to people. But i hv nvr heard that younger people can speak in banmal to older ppl(unless u r talking abt different authorities that they hv)
thank you for your attention on this qn^^-
Hello, greetings from Europe!
We are really glad you enjoy reading it because we enjoy writing it. Kimchi Man is sleeping now because of the time difference but I will ask him to reply to you tomorrow. ^^
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ok awaiting your reply ^^ thank you~~
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Since women are not seen as competition to guys, guys allow women to use 반말 with them easily. Since guys see each other as competition, they can be over 50 years old or more to allow it. So you can say 반말 to him.
But you seem to want some special thing. He most likely wants to be closer.
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Hi! I’m glad I found this blog! ^_^ I am in secondary school, so quite young and obviously not looking for a relationship yet but I would like to eventually marry a Korean, in Korea ^_^ Do you think it is possible for me to find a Korean man who would want to be with me, not just for ‘experience’? And do you think we (me and my imaginary boyfriend ;) ) could eventually get married? Thank you! ^_^
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As you can see there are plenty of women here, myself included, who have serious relationships with Koreans.
But you are still young, don’t worry, I am sure things will change even more by the time you decide to get married, and surely you will change as well. You may be surprised to find yourself wanting different things than you do now.
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Question: My Korean boyfriend asked his parents for permission to marry me. His parents said no because I am not Korean. They told him that he will be disowned if he chooses to be with me. He didn’t tell his parents that I am pregnant with his child. Will the baby change his parents mind? Will he abandon me and his child? Ever since his parents disapproved of us he has been distant. I am an American woman and don’t know how common it is for Korean parents to reject a partner because she isn’t Korean.
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I think that for your own situation it really doesn’t matter how common it is. Even if almost all Korean parents accept their child’s non-Korean partner, his parents might not, and vice versa.
I hope he comes around and does the right thing, but if he doesn’t you need to do what is right for your child which might include taking some legal action. Please consult an expert because I have no knowledge about such situations.
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Hello!
I’m a girl, chinese, from malaysia.
So, there is this korean guy from my college, we are doing the same course, so we actually ‘see’ or bump into each other quite a few times. We don’t know each other but when we bump or he walked pass me, the way he look at me, when we exchange glance, will be like ‘hey I’m interested in u’
u know tat kind of glance I meant right? like either some one will put up a ‘not interested’ glance or ‘interested glance’
well, he used the ‘interested glance’ to me (I’m not sure whether he did tat to other girls) k nvm. anyway, do korean guys do tat a lot? is it me tat think too much tat he is interested in me? (because ya I’m interested in him, kinda)-
It really depends on the particular guy, Koreans don’t have some collective behaviour.
Why don’t you try to approach him and talk to him and then you will see if he is really interested or not.
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i thought korean guys prefer girl who is shy, whereby guys have to make the first move first?
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Do guys in your country all like exactly the same type of girls?
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Hello Guys!
I’m a girl and i met this korean guy on internet . I started to fall in love with him and now we’re saying “i love you” to eachoter and all the sweet stuffs what couples say.I can’t even call him my “boyfriend” we’ve just been talking through internet for 55 days and i feel that i really love him but i am afraid he doesn’t feel the same way ..i mean he says stuff like ” i want to get married with you and have kids” (it;s kind of awkward since we know eachother just like 55 days )i still love him ..Maybe because i’m young i think it will be easy but sometimes it’s really hard .My mom does know about him and my friends too but here comes the problem . He hides me from his friend “a girl” because he doesn’t want to hurt her cuz he knows her longer than me and he promised her to not date foreign girl. This girl has already a boyfriend and i don’t know what’s there to hurt ? Sometimes i really think he doesn’t love me ..but than he says stuff like “hey chriss i talked to my mom about marrying a foreign girl” and he says that his mother says “she is still young and doesn’t know society and men” yeah it’s true i don’t really have experience in dating i just want to know his mind .
P.S sometimes he says perv stuff like showering together and other .. sometimes i think if i go there he just wants to do that “thing” and after he will leave me-
I didn’t pick up from your story who Chriss is.
But anyway, this promise he has given to his female friend is really strange. Why would she care if he dates foreigners or not?
Whatever you decide to do, be careful.
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It’s been a year I get to know a Korean guy, it was happen when i’m planning for my trip to Korea. At the beginning we contact each other asking for information and answer but then somehow we got really close to each other, we chat every single day, we even put as married status at one of social networking site, and yes we having lots of quarrel too. Not only that almost entire of my families known him as he keep asking me who is this and who is that, He Skype with my nieces and nephews too. On his birthday I sent something for him and on my birthday he also sent me some gifts, and some of the gift is what I really one, I didn’t ask him to buy for me, I just told him once I arrive at Korea I wanna buy that, but he sent those thing as my birthday present. When I ask him what are we, he told me we are just a friend. Then, when my trip is around the corner we having lots of quarrel. I was unsure but then i keep thinking positive and still go for a trip, even when I’m at Korea, we did fight at social networking until at the end we decided to meet. We spend good time together and before I going back to my country we meet for another time (he asking me), where we spend a night together, chatting and seeing a sun rise together. it was awesome experience. Then when I reached my country, for few days he kept asking when I’m going back to Korea again. Then as usual due to busy schedule and so on we having quarrel for some time. However, when he cool down he will contact me again and even we live far distance we sort of can read each other mind, for example if I said did he online? Few seconds he’s appear online, at first I thought it was accidentally but then when it happen lots of time is it can be considered as accidentally? Few months back I sent something for him, in a box, he’s happy to receive it and his mom also saw what I sent to him, he also gave it to his family. This means his family members already knew about me. Recently he deactivate his social networking account, and then we sharing a same social networking account, then later he made a new social networking account and using my family name combine with his name, and there only me and my family as his friend, I wonder what’s that mean? A few weeks ago, he told me that he got few days leave, I was kidded with him, telling him to come over here, and he did come over! We plan a short trip together and we really enjoy it so much. Yes while we on trip we did fight for few times but we make it up fast. While he’s here he visited and greets to my family, my family members were happy to meet him. When he’s back to Korea, again we having fight, sometimes makes me wonder what is happening and why it is happening, and until now I still clueless about this relationship.. I hope someone can help me..
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It seems like a complicated situation. I’m sorry you are confused, but honestly, so am I. ^^
It seems like you are friends who fight a lot? I really don’t know. Maybe someone else can chime in.-
Hehe, that’s the things.. we been quarrel almost every week!! LOL but then we still contact each other after every quarrel, and that’s make me more confused.. Honestly, he do a lots of things that shouldn’t be done if we were only just a friend. I ask some of it to my male friends and their answer was ” if I were on his shoes and saying we just a friend I would certainly never do those things; guys normally never shows their wallet to any other women except their loves one, they never buy any girly accessory like rings, necklace, pendent and etc to any other girl and why would a guy checking her account every day if only we were just a friend” and those answer make me more confused @_@, may be you can ask Kimchi man, is it Korean culture for a guy to treat any women or only for their loves one.. Kamsahamnida Oegukeen :)
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I really think that the way someone shows their love is deeply personal thing and not so much related to culture.
I don’t need to ask Kimchi Man to tell you that in Korean culture guys don’t just go around buying jewelry for random women. But that goes for every other culture in the world as well.
He seems to be doing things to show you he likes you but when you asked him directly he told you that you are just friends. It seems like this is something you need to solve with him.
But since you want Kimchi Man’s opinion he will reply to you as soon as his internet is repaired from typhoon damage.
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Thank You Oegukeen :) will wait for Kimchi Man’s opinion
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From what you described you have everything except official statement. There must be something going on :)
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I also read about Korean culture, for Korean man they will never let their parent knows about a girl or meeting a girl parent if there is nothing between them, Is it true? Anyway its good to hear some words from you guys :)
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Loving Korean 
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