These were questions asked in 2012. To ask a question right now, please go to our new section Ask Loving Korean.
Thank you all for submitting so many questions and making this blog grow. :)
If you are looking for answers we have given so far, check out answers section, which you can also find by clicking the drop-down menu “Posts” above.
433 responses to “Ask us 2012 Archives”
-
Hi, I actually knew a korean guy through online…we chat almost everyday, it seems a routine for us….but sometimes I think that online chat between both us could be difficult because we are from different country. I am from Malaysia. I knew him about 2 weeks plus…it seems that we are quite good friends with each other…seem we have good feelings…just don’t wish to lose contact with him….hmm…he is kind of funny, whenever I say Jal Ja to me, he will ask me why not Jal Ja Nae Kkum Kwar? I don’t say that because I heard that Jal Ja Nae Kkum Kwar is talk between a couple or someone special…but he always like me to say Jal Ja Nae Kkum Kwar to him…is a bit weird…sometimes, I am thinking can online friend or love be trusted??
-
A person who can be trusted in real life can be trusted online as well. But surely you can’t know whether he is a person like that after knowing him for just two weeks.
“Jal Ja Nae Kkum Kwar” means “Good night and dream about me.”-
Hi, from the way I know him and talk to him almost everyday in the webcam and mic, I can see that he can be trusted. Can you explain to me what you mean ‘whether he is a person like that’? Today I see his working place. He is working in KISA (Korea Internet and Security Agency)…He showed me his working place and so on. Actually, the word ‘Jal Ja Nae Kkum Kwar’…I seldom talk to him…hehe…but I have friends told me we can say this to our close friends or lover….actually, he didn’t force me to say also…he just teach me some basic korean words. Sometimes, he could make fun on me. He told me that he has good feeling on me and he like me because I don’t care about his height. He said that in Korea, hardly can know a girl who doesn’t care that he is short. He said both of us are too far from each other and we should have chance to meet each other in real person on day.
-
-
-
Don’t want to take anything for granted:
I’m on this Korean dating site, I’m interested in having a Korean boyfriend and more if possible. I’m a 48 year old white women and I got this message from this very attracted Korean man who is 41 years old. The only thing in the email was Hi…that was on May 2nd. I responded back on the 2nd asking him how long he has been in the US…he responded back on the 3rd letting me know he has been in the US for 15 years but only speaks English half. He wanted to know what I thought about Korean men and I wrote back telling him I am interested in learning Korean culture and language and dating Korean men.
The next email I got he stated this…”.I would love to talk to you many thing.
But writing problem.
can I talk?” I was taking that he wanted to exchange phone #’s and I asked him that, he says sure no problem remember half English. So then I wondered if that was what he was wanting to do…I was a little concern that he would feel like it came from me wanting to…not that I don’t. He writes me back and states “You can call me.
I’m saying about nervous.
We can talk..” So I wrote back and also gave him my number.He called me on Thursday May 10th and we talked for just a short and then he told me to text him my email address and he would send me some pictures. I sent him my email address and he sent me a couple of pictures. Then I receive this message from Kakao Talk it was from him…saying wow you use this? we talked for a short on that Friday evening and he sent me a couple more pictures and then he sends me the next message that he was very busy talk to later bye honey. I knew he was busy at work Friday’s and Saturdays is his busiest times. I followed up by saying I hope he has a restful night when he’s out of work. When he got home he sent me a reply saying Thanks…you too honey..GD night. I replied back because I was still up and the thought I was already in bed…we talked just for a few then he wanted to get a shower and sent me 3 smiling faces and 5 heart symbols.
Sorry I am finally coming to my question…when we had talked on the phone he said he would like to meet and that he wanted to start looking for his wife…he had been busy making his American dream and would like to be married in 2 years…I told him that I was in Ohio and he is currently in Texas and then will be going back to California….On Saturday morning I sent him a text just to say Good Morning with a smile face and he wrote back and we had some small chatter and then he states “Honey I miss you” I asked him did he still want to meet…he states “Yes, I’m not playing this. Very serious” I stated I am too…because I am…he states “Thank you…I will try best for you. then some more chatter and then “Honey I gotta work.”
My questions: Do I take that he is serious about a relationship with me and if so what should I think because he is still going on the online site…I went on to turn mine off…to see where this may go. and notice him online. The other question if I contact him first instead of waiting for him to contact me am i being pushy…I have read so much now I’m afraid of doing the wrong thing…I am really interested in getting to know him and see where this can go…and I’m not into playing head games or other games…so like I said at the beginning of this long message I don’t want to take anything for granted…in other words I don’t want to read into something if it’s not there…been burnt too many times by doing so.
Thank you for this great place to get information on relationships with Korean men and non Korean women.
-
You’re welcome, and in return, thank you for posting a question. We’ll answer it as soon as possible.
-
Thank you…I look forward to your reply… I also want to throw in another detail that just happened.
I was asking the Korean guy about him and I asked him through katalk if he had been married and if he had family in the US and he seemed hurt by my question…not sure why. Here is his reply and I hope you can also help me out with this too… “honey you have confusing with other guy. Maybe you talk with other Korean peoples. i told you single when we talk… I don’t feel good. What does that mean…I did not mean to say he was married I was just wondering if he had ever been married because I had. I wrote back and told him that I didn’t mean anything by it and that I was only talking to him no one else. Let him know that I felt bad if I hurt him.
If you could also give me some kinda help on it too would be great.
Thank you so much!…
-
New twist to my both of my comments…since the last comment I told you about on May 15th..the guy has stopped communicating with me over what I stated in the previous comment..and I don’t know what to do because I really like him even tho I have not met him and we have not been communicating for very long. There is something about him that draws me to him and I miss hearing his voice and texting him. I have talked to others before through chat and have not felt this way…I desperately need your help and response as soon as possible…I don’t know if to just give him more time or am I wasting my time. i can’t believe it could change from the way he was talking to me in the first comment that I posted to you. So please please can you please help me and give me your advise as soon as possible I am going crazy with not knowing what I did wrong.
Thank you,
-
I’m really sorry it did not work out the way you wanted it to.
After reading all three of your comments it seems your problem with him is more of a relationship problem and doesn’t have anything to do with the fact he is Korean. Kimchi Man and I feel we know about Korean culture, but we are not equipped to solve problems like this. We believe you will get a better advice from a professional advice column.
-
-
-
Hi,
So I have a question : Do korean people value and respect more europeans (more specifically continental europeans) than us, americans or british folks?
At my Uni, me and my buddies befriended few korean exchange students (1 girl and 2 guys). The other day we were talking about europe. At one point I asked them what they though about europe, and if they liked america better. They all told me unanimously that they really liked america, but they preferred europe (particularly italy, france and spain). I asked why, and they basically told me that europeans are good looking, more cultured, better dressed, thinner than us americans, and that basically europe was old and beautiful with lots of different languages and cultures. So I laughed, and was like “alright, fair enough”. But I have to say that the way they answered my questions really gave me the strong impression that they really think europeans are far better than americans. Also, oddly enough: the guys seems to think that american and british women seemed more promiscuous than the european ones (ok that kinda pissed me off, and I don’t think I need to explain why… -_-)
-
That’s a very intriguing questions. I’ll do a bit of research, consult Kimchi Man and let you know.
-
Thank you very much for taking the time to read my question. I’ll wait patiently for the answer ^^
-
Sorry that you had to wait a bit for the answer, but we hope you will like what we wrote https://lovingkorean.wordpress.com/2012/05/24/qa-do-koreans-value-europeans-more-than-americans/
-
-
-
Hi! I am an Asian-American high-schooler, and I’m a bit confused right now with a crush and a relationship. I had a Korean boyfriend of two years and was mistreated by him because I lied a small white lie and he took it to heart. He would be cold to me and be most bi-polar around me. One day, he’ll be who he was (charming, open and friendly) and the next he’ll be really harsh. We broke up two days ago but are still going through some complications. Well, I stopped hanging out with him last week and met an absolutely amazing Korean guy through a close friend, who came from Korea 4 years ago. After talking to him for a while, I started to feel attracted, but his friend tells me he prefers Korean girls. The third time we were around each other, I was talking to a friend and when I looked over, he looked up and we caught eye contact for several seconds, and a smile came onto his face halfway through, which got me curious. My close friend says he MAY be interested but that he is still a Korean and all. The Korean guy in question did tell me that most Korean males tend to go back to Korean females in the end, which broke my hope a little.
I do have hope that he may become more interested in me, but I feel so awkward around him! On Facebook, we talk for hours but when we see each other, it’s awkward. We talk about so many things, and he told me that I wasn’t like other girls and am very thoughtful and kind. He prefers Korean girls but says that they are very dramatic and expecting of their boyfriends a few moments later. I feel like I’m beginning to be attracted to him and I don’t understand how I fell so fast. He seems to ideal, smart, cute and extremely shy;. He knows my situation with my ex (who I loved dearly) and thinks, like everyone else does, that it isn’t a good relationship to be in. Unlike my ex, he doesn’t mind that I love Korean culture and even teaches me Korean at lunch breaks. He comforts me and makes sincere comments when we have more serious discussions, such as demanding girlfriends and how I think it’s very ridiculous how many Korean girls demand expensive gifts. He’s the polar opposite of my ex and seems like such an awesome guy. I can’t stop thinking about him, and I don’t understand at all. Do you think that even if he prefers Korean girls, he will still be able to see me in a different light?
He told me he likes his best girl-friend, but she isn’t interested, so that gave me a little hope. I invited him to a movie tomorrow, and somehow, I feel like he’s disinterested at one moment and interested the next. My mom is driving a few of us, and when I offered him a ride since he didn’t have one, he quickly refused. ._. I don’t understand at all. He’s so sweet with me and I’m positive that he’s a very nice, sincere guy. Do you think he might have a small push of feeling at me?
Just a little excerpt showing him being charming, and it confused me:
Me: Yea, I’ve moved a lot in my life xD
I know the right types and the ones to avoid.
Him: ohoho… very mature .. ;D
Me: Of course! Haha. I just don’t want to get hurt..I ask for very simple things.
Like trust. And I’m not the type to care about expensive gifts and such. Blegh.Him: korean girls expect stuff like that a lot.. ._.
Me: It’s not a good thing..
An ideal relationship is where both love each other and trust each other, without expecting diamonds or expensive stuff.
Him: mhmm..like, korean girls, they expect like alot… of their boyfriends…D:
Me:Yes, they doo..
Him: like 1-year event or special days
where girls get chocolate from guys… like that. If you skip one of them, they get pissed as hell kkk.
Me: Wow.. ._. Poor boyfriends..
Psht. all I want is time with my boyfriend on those kinds of days. xD
Having someone’s trust and love is enough. Gifts are just material.
Him: mhmm..there are really few girls who think like you kkk.
I think you’re really thoughtful and kind compare to foxy-koreans or other girls. Very mature. -__–
My friends say to go for him, and start a friendship, since they think he’s interested in me, but I just want some evaluation ._.
Sorry for the long post. It’s just really bothering me right now and I don’t need more frustration in my mind. Thank you so much, I hope you reply to me soon! ^_^
-
Hi and welcome. We are glad you asked us a question. We hope we can reply soon as well! But we have been getting many questions, which is wonderful, but means you might have to wait a bit. Don’t worry, we’ll do our best :)
-
I’ll be waiting on it! Thank you so much for this amazing blog. :)
-
You are very welcome, and we are so glad you like it. Here is the answer https://lovingkorean.wordpress.com/2012/05/20/qa-if-korean-guy-prefers-korean-girls-do-i-stand-a-chance/. We hope you like it as well. :)
-
-
-
Hello
I met this Korean guy in my school and he’s few years younger than me. I like him already before we started seeing each other. But unfortunately I was the one who first asked him to eat lunch with me. Now we still seeing each other though not that often, but what worries me is that I don’t have any idea about our status.I already told him that I like him but he just told me that we are friends. That made a bigger confusion on my part because he didn’t said that he doesn’t like me or confirm that we are “only just” friends.
Since I’m not a Korean I feel that there is no chance for him to like me but my friends keep on telling me that there’s a possibility that he also like me since he is always willing to see/meet me. But I still have this doubt that he is just being friendly and he doesn’t have any special feelings towards me. I don’t have any idea if he also think that we are having a date or he just consider it as a simple hang out with a friend.
Do you think he is just being friendly? And I don’t know also how to ask him regarding the things that bothers me about our status. How will I confront him? When he go out with me does that mean something?
I’m really looking forward to your advise. It will help me a lot. Thank you. :)
-
Hi, welcome to our site and thank you for posting a question :)
-
-
Hey there! So I was just wanting some insight on a relationship that I have found myself in.
I’m a 22y/o Canadian Female, and He is a 29Korean y/o Native S.korean. We met through volunteering at our church, and hit it off pretty quickly. He is super outgoing and funny, and we went out for dinner in Feb, where I secured a big crush on him :)
I decided not to jump out and confess to him, but just to be friends and see where it goes!About a month later, with us hanging out fairly often in groups, He confessed that he liked me and I confessed back. I did not expect it, or see it coming! It was a lovely surprise. We started to hang out alone more, and he got more physical (Hand holding, cheek kissing all that junk haha) and I really was growing to like him, excited to another person in my life.
The thing was we never decided that we were dating or where it was going, so I was feeling torn about enjoying that date-y atmosphere when we were together, but having a Casual-contact friendship when apart.
Fast forward a month (to Apr 28th about) and I told him that we needed to talk about where this was going. After dinner we went to a coffee shop and talked. I told him I knew what I wanted, but did he? I told him I am looking for a relationship in the future. We talked a long time, he said he worried a lot about losing our friendship if we broke up and really wanting to be careful because I am important to him. These things make sense and I respect it!
The MAIN thing that came out of this is that He said “In my culture, one party falls in love, and then you become boyfriend and girlfriend” and he was SHOCKED when I told him that here, often we will date as b/f g/f for a year even and then say I love you. He wants to pursue the friendship and wait on “A change of heart” but I don’t know how to pursue something that seems to be lacking commitment? I would love insight into this if you have any!
He asked for time to think, now that he knows how I feel and we didn’t contact each other for almost 1.5 weeks after the conversation. We did hang out in a group the other night, and it was nice, he texted me after wishing me well to work. I really care for this guy, and I don’t want to have our friendship fall in to awkward-ville, but I also don’t want to find out I’ve been “friend-zoned” haha :)
Any advice would be great, I feel at a bit of a stand-still right now and a bit unsure of where to go next :)
Thanks for reading my novel – any insight will be appreciated. Blessings
-
Welcome to our site and thank you for posting a question. We will try to answer it as soon as possible.
-
Loving Korean 
Leave a reply to writer1986 Cancel reply