Korean dictionary defines Oppa ( 오빠 ) as “older brother of a female”. However, addressing other people in Korean language is never that simple. To truly understand the meaning of the word oppa, you must understand a bit about Korean culture.
For Koreans, it is really important to observe the relationship between the speaker and the subject of the sentence and the speaker and the audience. That’s just a fancy way to say you must be careful who you are speaking about and who is listening. That sounds paranoid, haha, but it’s actually all about showing respect to those with higher status than you. And who has higher status? Anyone in your family who is older than you, any stranger of equal or greater age, employer, customer, teacher, etc.
This may be difficult for non-Koreans to accept, but if a person is superior to you, you should never use their name or say “you”.
I have already been Kimchi Man’s girlfriend for a few weeks when I realized I don’t know his parents’ names! Feeling like a bad girlfriend, I asked him what their names were. Instead of an answer I just got a few grunts and then silence. Thinking he didn’t understand, which is not a rare occurrence considering neither of us is a native speaker of English, I asked again. Silence. After more prodding I finally realized what the problem was. And it wasn’t until I explained that I would just like to have that as an information and promised never to say their name in front of them, that he finally told me their names.
And if that is not curious enough, I recently read an article stating that there used to be women in Korean villages who didn’t even know their own names! All their lives they had been called sister, daughter, Ms., mother, wife, and they never needed to use their names.
Even if you don’t speak Korean, if you have watched Korean dramas you are probably already familiar with some of this. Hyung, ajusshi, ajumma, seonsaengnim, noona, … Everyone has their title. Did you know that ajusshi and ajumma used to be terms reserved just for family, meaning aunt and uncle? Well, same thing happened with the definition of oppa: it used to be exclusively a family term meaning older brother, but its meaning expanded to mean unrelated older male who you have somewhat close relationship with. What it hasn’t changed is implied respect and superiority of the person you are addressing, and that is something most non-Korean women using this term don’t understand.
Who can I call oppa?
You can say oppa ONLY to an older male. Older person is anyone who was born in the year prior to your birth. So, even if he is a few months older, but born in the same year as you, you can’t call him oppa. Also, it can be strange calling men over certain age oppa. That age is not strictly defined, but probably somewhere over 30.
Why do Korean guys like to be called oppa?
Even though calling a guy oppa can be no more exciting than calling an older woman ajumma, if said with the right tone of voice, it indicates that you like a guy as more than just a friend. And who doesn’t like being liked? It’s flirtatious, and flirting is usually exciting.
Do Korean guys dislike when non-Korean girls call them oppa?
Some Korean guys say ‘yes’ some say ‘no’. But I believe it’s not that simple. It all depends on the intent. First, realize that word itself doesn’t have any magical powers. The magic comes from the person using it. If a foreign girl is going around squealing oppa at a guy she barely knows I can see how that can be a turnoff. But if you wait until you develop a more intimate relationship, and use it sincerely, I’m sure the guy would be pleasantly surprised.
I rarely use oppa with Kimchi Man. It just sounds unnatural to throw in a random Korean word when speaking English. But I once I start speaking Korean (and hopefully that will be before he becomes ajusshi) I would probably naturally switch to calling him oppa.
How to pronounce oppa?
Hear correct pronunciation of 오빠. Please let me know if you are having trouble hearing this file.
And that’s all you need to know to give a correct translation of oppa.
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Fascinating!!! I’d always wondered about that!! I tried to ask a Korean friend once why she called her husband Oppa. I couldn’t figure out why you’d want to call someone you were sleeping with ‘brother’. Just seemed a little weird to me…. But my friend couldn’t explain it to me and the conversation got a little strange. :D
Your explanation makes much more sense! Thanks!
I’m glad you understood. I was worried I am not being clear enough. Sometimes (all the time) English gives me trouble. :)
Married women usually switch to calling their husbands “yobo” which roughly translates to “darling”. But I think some people avoid it cause it makes them feel old.
I’m not sure if my Korean boyfriend likes or not, though he speaks Korean, French, and English, I wouldn’t use it due to the fact that it isn’t in my nature to use terms such as.
His natural tone in my opinion is fluently French. So I’d try using such words to
speak while I’m visiting him in Paris. What a great post. Thanks!
Yeah, it can be a bit awkward mixing different languages while speaking.
However, while in Korea and while speaking Korean, it’s not really dependant on what type of person you are to use “oppa”. It’s their culture.
Well I knew what oopa meant. I’m not saying the type or preference of men I’m use to(lol). I wouldn’t use it because it isn’t a term I could just use anywhere. But in respect to my male friend(s) I’ve known for awhile, maybe then that would be respectful to use honorifics.
Oh, thanks for this post. I remember my ex squealing with delight whenever I call him oppa. Hahaha. It’s like his face will suddenly bright up and he’ll say, “Good. Hmm, I’ll give you everything.” Hahaha hilarious :)
He sounds like a real cheerful guy :)
I jokingly call my boyfriend hyung-nim sometimes LOL
and of course he doesn’t like it and corrects me, but I feel weird? calling my boyfriend oppa because I feel like Koreans might think it’s weird that a non-Korean is using their term of endearment, especially since our conversations are primarily all in English? shrug!
Haha, hyung-nim.
Yeah, that’s exactly how I feel as well.
Great article!
I don’t use it that much with my husband because most of the time I’m using English (but like you hope to learn more Korean before he becomes too old!)
I do use it sometimes when I want something or want him to do something for me. Usually I try to ask in Korean too. He knows I’m using it in a cute way because I want something but he can’t resist when I use it like that. I guess I limit its use because it has more power when I just pull it out occasionally… haha.
Haha, I didn’t know the word oppa can be “abused” in such a way ;)
I love u lobo.my oppa cutie pie.hahahehe.lol!!!love ya kimchi man.when did u give her the ring was it yrs after u meet her.when did u introduce her to ur family?also do u plan on spending holiday christmas @ ur family or in rome?lol
We are not in Rome. You have us mistaken for someone else.
Although I always knew what the meaning of oppa was this was still really fun to read I’m a Korean learner blogger :) and I loved this post! 대박
It’s great you thought it’s fun :)
Your blog looks really nice.
I heard that word in Korean Drama and I liked it kk
Hmm, you know! My Korean friend asked me to call him Oppa and record it to him, I did that kk and he said that he liked it ᄒᄒ
Dose that mean anything!
Whoa, I never knew that you couldn’t call a guy oppa if he was older than you but still born in the same year LOL. This post may have saved my future conversations with a Korean person xD. Anyways, I really like a lot of your posts haha so expect to see more of me around! :3
Yeah, most people are not aware of that catch.
We would love to see more of you around here!
It’s really fun to read! Maybe I’ll call my crush hyung-nim, ajhussi, ajhumma, and finally oppa. Just to tease him. ;-)
I give all kinds of nicknames to Kimchi Man. I sometimes say “hyung” with deep voice and he pretends it freaks him out. ^^
Question–Out of curiosity, would a Korean girl call her actual (biological) brother Oppa? Or is it strictly used for flirting/friendship relationships? : )
Yes. Majority of Korean girls call their older brother oppa.
As I said, the meaning of oppa got extended. It didn’t get replaced.
Thanks! : )
It was my pleasure. :) Let me know if I can further explain anything else.
I actually chose to never call my friends “Oppa” because well, a) I first learned it from Dramas,where every girl was oppa-ing up on her Oppas, and I didn’t want to put that emotion into it. and B) I didn’t wanna use it inappropriately/ at the wrong time. Just. Awkward.
ANYWAY: That was until I met a friend who I only speak/write in korean with. I couldn’t figure out what to call him. I was paranoid about being polite, and not rude, but it just wasn’t working. Finally he told me “Call me Oppa!” and, since then, 10 Million times easier. And I feel like I understand a bit more. It’s not weird, or romantic or awkward with him. He is just my “Oppa” in this situation. Older, Korean, Male. Sweet.
Yes, you are right, it is best used when it comes naturally. It just proves that even though dramas may give us some cultural education, it is not really how most people act on everyday basis.
My boyfriend only calls his sister Noona which would be a male-to-older-female version of oppa. She’s even listed under Noona under his cellphone contacts.
I really liked your post it did give me some insight since I am dating a half Korean guy who LOVES to be called “Oppa” In fact, when I said to him “I like you” He replied, “Well why don’t you ever call me oppa then?” He basically told me that because I have basic knowledge of the Korean language and never said it he was confused (It was SO cute) any ways I watch a lot of K-Drama, Spanish novellas etc. and I have noticed also even though it supposed to mean “older brother” or “older guy whom I am familiar with” Often, the females in the drama use it to define the nature of the relationship in a more intimate way often upsetting the heroine one way or another, (Either she feels dumb because she’s his dong-sang or angry because they have a “special” relationship) In any case that was my only reference to how it is used in Korean culture. So now I rarely use his name its just “Oppa” or “Babe” he usually calls me by other pet names. In addition I also I don’t go squealing “Oppppaaaaaa!” through the streets either because that’s a little tacky. But the other thing he says to me too is all his Korean guy friends only have one girl who can call them oppa, insinuating the relationship one way or another as more that “friends” When I called him “Oppa” at the gym (amidst his friends) he positively blushed lol. but I’ve always wondered why he liked it So much.Thank you for the clarification.
We are really happy what we wrote is clear. And we are happy you have such a cute boyfriend. :)
I’ve never tried to use the word “oppa” to my husband. Just like most Korean men, the word oppa coming from the woman he loves is music to his ears… but I think it’s more of a “flirty” word than a term of endearment.^^
I knew the meaning and usage of oppa, so I have a question for another suffix/honorific, it’s “goon”, I can’t find reliable information about this one, is it used from older female adressing a younger man but in a more respectful way? Is that true?
It’s spelled 군 in Korean. Doesn’t matter which gender, I can also call a male younger than me goon. Can be used for who isn’t married yet. If someone is married than I think he is grown man so goon is too low. Maybe someone would dare call him that but not me.
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This was really informative!! I’m glad I clicked on your site I honestly had no idea that there was a history behind that word.
Thank you! We are glad you clicked on it too :)
my korean boyfriend is 2years younger than me (which is not pretty obvious) hahaha
is there a word like “oppa” aside from yobo i can call to my boyfriend?as much as i want to call him “oppa” because a lot of my korean fanatic friends (i’m not a korean fanatic) say that it would be very flattering for them to hear their girlfriends calling them oppa but i can’t because i’m older than him..:-(
“Jagi” would be natural. “Yobo” is for a bit older and married women. And he can call you “nuna”.
I had a question! My Korean friend – who I might soon be dating – likes to refer to himself as oppa, even though we are the same age (I’m 3 days older). I feel unnatural using the term, but he really, really likes the idea of his girlfriend calling him that. If we date, I would still probably never call him that in public, but maybe in private. It would be weird in public, correct?
Also, let’s pretend we’re only acquaintances and the same age – would we really only call each other by our names, no other term?
Thanks for the blog post! Very informative.
You can call each other in private anything you want ^^ And it’s not like anyone will arrest you if you use it in public, it’s just not correct, that’s all :)
Like Kimchi Man said above, you can call each other “jagi” which means something similar to “darling”.
Hi! Thanks for this blog! You’ve unraveled the mystery behind OPPA haha. I’m a fan of Koreanovelas and I often stumble with this word and I’m confused.. thanks for shedding some light in me.. haha.