How to get a Korean guy to like you

How to get a Korean guy to like youHow to get a Korean guy to like you and how to make him fall in love with you are some of the most common search terms that bring people to our site. We’ve addressed how to tell if a Korean guy likes you, but haven’t given an answer on how to get him to feel this way.

I’m going to start off with the boring and generic (but true!) answer, and then quickly move on to something much more important. So here it goes: Korean men are not so strongly influenced by their culture that they would have some collective preference to women. Korean guys love all kinds of different women (and men).

Now the important part.

I believe there are two types of readers reading this. First are those who think it’s a silly question that has no real answer, and second type are those who really want a concrete answer and not some vague “we are all special and unique” nonsense.

I’m more inclined to side with the first group. But I also know it’s easy for me to judge and pretend I’m above asking such questions when I am on the other side of the river of love, firmly holding my beloved man.

The truth is, I also was worried when I first fell in love with Kimchi Man. I was worried he might misunderstand the type of person I am because of different cultural context. Take, for example, modesty. South Korea and Europe appear to have different sets of standards and I was worried Kimchi Man might condemn the clothes I wear. We all walk half-naked around here in the summer and he’s never worn a pair of short pants in his life.

And yes, I knew that no man has the right to judge me for the clothes I wear, blah, blah, but all I could think of was that I just really really want him to like me. Another example is the attitude towards school. I wanted Kimchi Man to know I was really hard working and a good student, but how can 6-7 hours a day I spent in school compare to Koreans who spend all day long locked up in there, only to study into the wee hours of the night?

So, while I can honestly say that, now that I’ve been through it all and got to know Koreans better, there is absolutely nothing that would make all Korean guys like a woman, it doesn’t really worry me that so many women ask me that shallow question.

What worries me is the problem that is much deeper and more sinister. The questions we get are always asking if she might not have a chance with Korean guy because she’s heavy or black or doesn’t act cute or has curly hair… Ok. Fine.

But how come no woman is worried that she’s not educated or interesting or funny enough? Girls, you have to give Korean guys more credit. Beautiful women may be hard to resist, but beauty stops being a novelty after a while, and even more quickly if one is boring, mean or dim. I’m sure you can think back to some handsome guy or an actor who suddenly wasn’t so handsome after all, as soon as he displayed an ugly personality?

So if you want to do something to get a Korean guy to really like you, get a higher degree, work on your grades, try to be a kinder person, be interested in things so you can be interesting in a conversation, be trustworthy… In short, seduce him with your brain.

And the modesty thing from the beginning? He never asked me to change the way I dress, and as we both discovered, he has a pair of really nice legs that look great in shorts. :)

– Oegukeen




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59 thoughts on “How to get a Korean guy to like you

  1. Hi, girls! I need advice! I Korean guy told me that he liked me for a long time and start pushing our relation really hard! He even started to kiss me in front of his Korean friend and my friends, asked me for dinner and so on. And after i realized that i feel comfortable that way… he just disappeared… Like not responding on Kakao or doing it with few days delay… Few times he said that he will call me out and didn’t do it. Instead he went out with friends and things like that. I am really confused. Help me, please!

  2. I’m a gay man from the US living in japan and except for a few friends, I’m in the closet. Several months back I met a korean guy. Our common language is japanese…but I’m not fluent and there are some communication problems.
    That being said, I’m not sure if he is interested in me as just a friend or if he is gay and in the closet like myself.
    Our housemates say we act like brothers and we seem to bring each other out of our shells when we are together and are willing to sit together quietly away from the group and despite not being able to communicate so well with each other, he’s very willing to spend hours a day with me going out and about.
    He has things he wants to say to me and he will tell others so I know what he means.
    I often catch him smiling at me for no reason and we play eye tag and make faces at each other without exchanging words. He’s fairly willing to make physical contact with me and even let me touch him on the shoulder or pat him on the stomach. And we wrestle around.
    That being said, if our knees or arms touch accidentally he’ll usually be the first to pull away after some time has passed.
    As far as I’m aware he has only ever had one sexual partner and that was while he clearly stated that it happened while he was serving in the military…so not sure if that was a prostitute or not.

    Basically I’m just not sure if he is interested in me as a friend or if he is a closeted gay man or even unsure if he is gay…and I’d rather not ask him directly unless I’m fairly sure.

    • Why don’t you bring out the gay subject? like… oh, a friend told me that there was a gay festival in her town, as my friend is gay, he went and he told me that it was awesome (and start talking about homosexuality)

        • Well, he caught me off guard about a couple months ago on a walk and he asked me, “Are you gay?” Since I didn’t want to lie to him, I said, “yes.” And in a moment that replays over and over in my head, he basically shouted at me on the street and proclaimed that he likes women and has no interest in men and that I should expect nothing out of him except friendship.
          Now things are awkward at best and we can still meet if there are others around…and on occasion there are glimmers that our old friendship still remains, but quickly after he pulls away and it is like I am diseased.
          I’ve lost a friend I really cared about.

  3. Hello! :-) I was wondering if you could help me. I am planning on learning Korean and other languages as well, but I want to do maybe some sort of teaching job. I live in America right now and I want to know how an American can make friends in Korea as I am sure it is completely different? I basically want to be a likable person, polite and fun to help me learn more about the culture and language. Thank you so much for any advice!

    • It is not completely different! We are all the same species :)

      We answered a similar question before, “Can I make friends in Korea“.

      To be polite you can follow their manners, like handing things with both hands, respectfully addressing older people, not sticking chopstick in your rice bowl, etc. There are a lot of etiquette advices online and you can read up on those before you go.

      However, keep in mind I knew none of those when I first met Kimchi Man. I used etiquette rules of my own country (although it’s true that we met in my country not in Korea so that might have player some small role in it too), and Kimchi Man and his friends used etiquette rules of Korea and there was never any problem. Everyone was deemed polite, we had a great time, and on those rare occasions that something played out differently than it would have if we were all from the same country we actually embraced and enjoyed the exoticism of the moment.

      Being a foreigner is what makes you interesting and different. Embrace it and enjoy your time in Korea.

    • hi dear… i am iranian and i am student of french language and literature .i love somuch korea..iwant make a relation with a korean boy…can you help me?

  4. Hi, I just found this blog and I love it thanks for the hard work. I wanted to say that nobody can put cultures and men in one pot. It’s the same when we say “all boys are the same” yes from scratch all men work the same but also they’re different and have different interests in women. I can tell this from my culture (Turkish) our men have a stereotype too, like being so romantic and caring bla bla. I can tell you it’s not true. I’d never marry a man of my country. And I’m 28 already. Everybody who knows turkey would know I’m out of point as a wife. Family and friends (all married with kids) tell me I’ll have barely a chance for a marriage lol. I want to marry a Korean man. Because the mentality just suits me. Ah yes, what I wanted to say is, that not all Korean men are the same and you just should be yourself and let him be “man”
    I’d just like to know how to find a Korean man who wants to get married with a Turkish girl haha. We have rarely Koreans in Germany (I’m living in Germany) and when you say, be educated, I just finished school started working but now I’m at home looking for my father and my younger brother and I didn’t study because family was more important. Do I have not any chances now? Still makes me worry tbh.

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  6. hi..
    i just want to ask ? that is there any possibility that koreans would love a girl who dont have white skinn..?

    • I have a lot of Korean friends and one of them who is like my older brother had the conversation with me. He knows the guy I have a crush on an asked him the same question, He told me that he doesn’t care about race and neither do most Koreans he knows. Go for it and if he likes you race/ skin color won’t matter at all.

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  8. Well, what if you meet a Korean man online? Like on something like hot or not or badoo? I’m interested in korean men and culture but I’m way too shy and I tend to act like a huge kid…

  9. Hi I just wanna ask this silly question of mine
    “Is tutoring a korean guy is a helpful way to his heart”? I just wanted to know because you said in order to get him seduce him with your brain.

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