Loving Korean

Introduction – Love Beats Everything

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oegukeen

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Introduction – Love Beats Everything
Korean man and white woman
Kimchi Man and Oegukeen

I’m European, you can call me Oegukeen. My boyfriend is Korean – Kimchi Man – which makes us an interracial, intercontinental and international (did I forget anything? :) ) couple.

While this relationship has been nothing short of a wonderful experience for both of us, we noticed that a lot of negativity is circling around the web about Koreans dating non-Koreans. His parents will certainly be against you, he will expect you to be obedient housewife while he drinks into wee hours with his coworkers, he will be aggressive and jealous…

Not true!

There are all kinds of Korean men and what your boyfriend is like depends only on which guy YOU chose.

My Korean boyfriend is nothing like this. He is kind and caring, and his parents have been wonderful to me. That doesn’t mean all Korean families are like that. But like every person, they should be given a chance to make an impression before they get judged.

While interracial relationship poses some new challenges we never felt neither burdened nor discouraged. After all, love beats everything, right?

Click on the “Answers” to read what we have answered so far and to join the discussion with many other girls and women who are involved with Korean guys or wish they were. Welcome!

  • Kimchi Man and Oegukeen

 

Edit: Read what happened to our relationship 4 years later

20 responses to “Introduction – Love Beats Everything”

  1. singleumma Avatar
    singleumma

    Hi. I find your blog very interesting and helpful. ^^ I was just browsing yesterday and fortunately found your blog and since then, I can’t stop reading! ^^~ It helped me understand things. ^^~

    Anyway, I’ve been wanting to ask you this. Is it normal for Korean guys to ask you out for drinks for your first meeting when both of you are totally complete strangers?

    I’ve been chatting to this Korean guy for four days now and he’s really eager to meet me. He’s aware that I am a single mom and I can’t just go out anytime. He’s nice and gentle and he seems to be consistent in what he’s showing but it’s still too early to tell.

    Anyway, I really thought that he will stop talking to me just like others do when they find out that I already have a baby, but he didn’t. He became nicer to me so I don’t have any doubts in meeting him. I just wanted to know if it’s normal for them to ask someone out for drinks in first meeting. This is also the first time I’ll meet someone that I just met online so I am just being cautious. ^^

    It’s not fine with me so I told him that I am not comfortable in doing that. If he really wants to drink, I can just go with him to chill out and I’ll just drink non alcoholic beverage. He agreed and told me that he might not communicate well if we’ll just go for coffee as I first suggested. I also asked him the question and he said yes.

    He’s 24 and I’m 23. He’s in my country right now because he’s an exchange student.

    I am an Asian. ^^~

    Hope you can help me understand this. Since I don’t have any Korean friends, I am just looking for possible answers online and I really can’t find anything. Thanks in advance and more power to this site! ^^~

    PS: I really love the article wherein you said that the quality of the messages is more important than the quantity. ^^

    Reply
    1. oegukeen Avatar
      oegukeen

      Thank you! I’m so happy to hear that :D

      There’s really no such thing as ‘normal’ and ‘not normal’ in Korea as much as there is anywhere else. Something that is perfectly normal in a relationship between two people will be shocking to others.

      So, if it makes you uncomfortable don’t do it, even if it is due to cultural differences. And you are right, you just met someone online four days ago, caution is advised.

      Reply
      1. Avatar
        Anonymous

        Hi ougukeen! :) Just read your reply. Thanks for your time and I was really happy this past few days because of the korean dude. I brought a friend with me when I met him the first time and he brought a friend too. ^^ After that meeting, we see each other for like twice or thrice a week. He’s still consistent with what he’s showing and things are just getting more interesting. ^^ Thanks for your blogs. I really learned a lot~! I read again your blogs today and it answered the question in my head. ^^~

        Reply
        1. oegukeen Avatar
          oegukeen

          That’s great to hear, both about your guy and about our blog! ^^

          Reply
  2. Sarah Avatar
    Sarah

    Hi! I just found your blog and it’s really enjoyable ^^ What country are you from exactly, if you don’t mind me asking?

    Reply
    1. oegukeen Avatar
      oegukeen

      We are so happy you find it enjoyable :D

      I’m from Europe, and I’m not a native English speaker. In general we prefer not to mention my country so that people don’t get hung up on nationality and just accept this is a blog for every non-Korean in love with a Korean guy.

      Reply
  3. Kylie Avatar
    Kylie

    Hi! I just found your blog and am really enjoying it! I recently a spent lot of time battling a major illness and had more time on my hands than usual. During that time, I discovered K-Dramas and K-Pop and they have become huge interests to me. They uplifted me, made me laugh and smile at a very tough time in my life. I have come to realise there is something about the Korean culture that really speaks to my heart and I am intrigued to learn more! I have even started learning the language so I can understand what they are saying in the dramas and songs first-hand!

    I am curious to know how you met your boyfriend online? How did you find him and how did you start to connect to him? Did it take a while to relate to each other so intimately or did you recognise each other as soul mates right away? I hope you can answer this question and you won’t find it too rude or intrusive? I have never had a boyfriend and many people are urging me to try online dating. Is that where you met Kimchi Man? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to!

    Reply
    1. oegukeen Avatar
      oegukeen

      Hello Kylie,

      Actually, getting severely ill also influenced my interest in Korean culture and the decision to start this site with my boyfriend.

      However, I met him while I was still completely healthy and I had no idea nor special interests in any aspect of Korean culture nor entertainment.

      We did meet online, but it wasn’t a dating site, it was a penpal site. I dislike the idea of dating sites because I wouldn’t like to communicate with someone who I had to judge as a potential partner right away and who was doing the same to me.

      I had many penpals and my current boyfriend stood out from them only as a really good friend. We did notice within 3rd or 4th message that we had unusually lot in common, but we were both convinced it would lead to years of happy e-mailing, nothing more.

      Of course, whether I like dating sites or not should have no influence on whether you use them or not.

      We wrote more about our story in these posts
      Is it crazy falling in love with a Korean guy online
      The kind of relationship we are in
      Is Korean man’s online love real
      How we met

      If you have any more questions, don’t hesitate to ask.

      Reply
      1. Kylie Avatar
        Kylie

        Hi! Thanks so much for your answer to my question! I’m glad you didn’t mind how personal it was!

        Thanks for your information about penpal sites. I’ve never heard of such a thing before. Might be worth checking out!

        I think your story is way more romantic than if you’d met through a dating site. I am a little shy but deep down I am very romantic. I think the reason I haven’t joined a dating site (yet) is because it just seems so calculated and practical. Where is the romance in that? But then again in this day and age I know a lot of people meet their soul mates that way. I just wish real life could be more romantic sometimes. Sounds like you and Kimchee Man have had an amazingly romantic story and I envy you a tiny bit!

        I’m sure you can tell why I love K-Dramas so much! They seem to be able to get romance just right in my estimation!

        Reply
        1. oegukeen Avatar
          oegukeen

          Ah, yes, it’s wonderful when you find something to watch that pushes all the right emotional buttons :)

          Yeah, our story could be considered romantic, but don’t forget that with romance terrible suffering always seems to go hand-in-hand :S

          Reply
  4. Eileen黃愛玲 Avatar
    Eileen黃愛玲

    I am happy for you. :) I think it’s great that you created this blog. I wish you happiness.

    I live in Taiwan with my husband (who happens to be from Taipei). I write about my adventures over there. Nice to meet you.

    Reply
    1. oegukeen Avatar
      oegukeen

      Thank you! Nice to meet you too.
      If you don’t mind me asking, how did you two meet?

      Reply
      1. Eileen黃愛玲 Avatar
        Eileen黃愛玲

        We met on myspace, out of all places. :) My husband, Dawen, wanted to move back to Taiwan, so I decided to follow them there. I’m basically a trailing spouse, so to speak. :) Although, we both lived in South Florida together before we head to Taiwan. It’s not like, “Hey, nice to meet you. Oh, you’re going to Taiwan? I’ll follow you there.” Haha.

        Reply
        1. oegukeen Avatar
          oegukeen

          My boyfriend and I met online as well. And since we wee living on other sides of the world for us it was kind of like: “Hey, nice to meet you. I’m going to travel 10 000 to be with you.” Haha :D

          Reply
          1. Eileen黃愛玲 Avatar
            Eileen黃愛玲

            Haha, that’s cool! I moved from New England to South Florida and then South Florida to Taipei. Sometimes it’s good to take risks; good things can come out of it. :)

          2. oegukeen Avatar
            oegukeen

            I agree!

  5. 최다해 gongjumonica Avatar
    최다해 gongjumonica

    You are so lucky to find your Korean man! :)

    Reply
    1. oegukeen Avatar
      oegukeen

      I was truly lucky to find such an amazing man.

      Reply
      1. 최다해 gongjumonica Avatar
        최다해 gongjumonica

        I am happy for you! I am currently dating a Korean and hopefully we’ll click!

        Reply
        1. oegukeen Avatar
          oegukeen

          Good luck!

          Reply

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