How to get a Korean guy to like you

How to get a Korean guy to like youHow to get a Korean guy to like you and how to make him fall in love with you are some of the most common search terms that bring people to our site. We’ve addressed how to tell if a Korean guy likes you, but haven’t given an answer on how to get him to feel this way.

I’m going to start off with the boring and generic (but true!) answer, and then quickly move on to something much more important. So here it goes: Korean men are not so strongly influenced by their culture that they would have some collective preference to women. Korean guys love all kinds of different women (and men).

Now the important part.

I believe there are two types of readers reading this. First are those who think it’s a silly question that has no real answer, and second type are those who really want a concrete answer and not some vague “we are all special and unique” nonsense.

I’m more inclined to side with the first group. But I also know it’s easy for me to judge and pretend I’m above asking such questions when I am on the other side of the river of love, firmly holding my beloved man.

The truth is, I also was worried when I first fell in love with Kimchi Man. I was worried he might misunderstand the type of person I am because of different cultural context. Take, for example, modesty. South Korea and Europe appear to have different sets of standards and I was worried Kimchi Man might condemn the clothes I wear. We all walk half-naked around here in the summer and he’s never worn a pair of short pants in his life.

And yes, I knew that no man has the right to judge me for the clothes I wear, blah, blah, but all I could think of was that I just really really want him to like me. Another example is the attitude towards school. I wanted Kimchi Man to know I was really hard working and a good student, but how can 6-7 hours a day I spent in school compare to Koreans who spend all day long locked up in there, only to study into the wee hours of the night?

So, while I can honestly say that, now that I’ve been through it all and got to know Koreans better, there is absolutely nothing that would make all Korean guys like a woman, it doesn’t really worry me that so many women ask me that shallow question.

What worries me is the problem that is much deeper and more sinister. The questions we get are always asking if she might not have a chance with Korean guy because she’s heavy or black or doesn’t act cute or has curly hair… Ok. Fine.

But how come no woman is worried that she’s not educated or interesting or funny enough? Girls, you have to give Korean guys more credit. Beautiful women may be hard to resist, but beauty stops being a novelty after a while, and even more quickly if one is boring, mean or dim. I’m sure you can think back to some handsome guy or an actor who suddenly wasn’t so handsome after all, as soon as he displayed an ugly personality?

So if you want to do something to get a Korean guy to really like you, get a higher degree, work on your grades, try to be a kinder person, be interested in things so you can be interesting in a conversation, be trustworthy… In short, seduce him with your brain.

And the modesty thing from the beginning? He never asked me to change the way I dress, and as we both discovered, he has a pair of really nice legs that look great in shorts. :)

– Oegukeen

 

 

 

You might also like:

Oppa do you love me thumbnail Do Korean men like black women Are Korean men only attracted to skinny women
How to know if Korean guy likes you? Am I in a relationship with this Korean man? Are Korean men only attracted to skinny women?

59 responses to “How to get a Korean guy to like you”

  1.  Avatar
    Anonymous

    I have a korean bf. born there but moved in the states couple of years ago. When we meet it was thro online dating. We were connected but there was a huge difference when we met. I was too shy he thought right away that i didnt like him. Im not sure if all korean guys are like this but with him, if i dont respond in time he thinks “im not good enough” he really cared about his looks since he is a bit chubby but i didnt care. When we got to know each other better, there was almost like a set of rules that cant be broken. He’s had bad relationships with asian girls before so he tends to avoid it but like a guy still finds them attracting (aka porn) but he really likes the latina style which is even worse for me even tho i am one there are really busty women better looking them me. My korean man cares about his girl’s body since he is the one enjoying it lol. He is picky about what i should and shoudnt wear. No v necks but short shorts are ok for some reason. He really wanted me to wear makeup, fix my hair, do my nails, be less shy, go on a diet, he has these high standards. But the tickly thing here is that you cant really be yourself in a relationship with a korean guy (if your non korean) There are changes to adapt and avoid certain ones. I choose doung my nails, less skin showing, on a diet. Oh and They are very question-y . But the way i got my bfs attention was by being honest, he does joke around almost like a “trap joke” he would say “would you be able to pay for the gas for his car and etc” i answered sure, he said “jk” he wanted to see if i was selfish or greedy. Ive meet some of his freinds and it see,s like guys dont like their girls to be too “money wasteful” if you spend xxx.xx $ on one thing they would break up with you soon but guys do give expensive gifts to their girls on special events. Girls wanting to date a korean, make sure you can adapt but know where to set your limit , have a thick skin when they joke around, and dont cry my korean guy gets mad when i do so dont cry or they will walk out on you, be the type who is ready to get married, serious about it.

    1. oegukeen Avatar

      Oh, wow.

      PLEASE don’t say this is the way Korean guys are. It is not. This is the way one Korean guy you know is.

      I spend all day long in baggy pajamas, I don’t wear make-up unless it is special occasion, I’m European so we walk in tiny amount of clothes in the summer. And my Korean boyfriend is fine with all that. Even if he wasn’t he wouldn’t say anything.

      Actually, I’ve never met another person who lets me do what I want as much as he does. Everyone else I’ve ever been in a relationship with would try to change at least the little things. He’s very much live-and-let-live type of guy.

      So yeah, you should be aware that those things your boyfriend does are his personality, not his culture.

      1.  Avatar
        Anonymous

        Great answer!

  2. InterestingWoman? Avatar
    InterestingWoman?

    So, I’ve been trying for years to seduce a man with my brain and it doesn’t work, so this article says that I may get a chance with someone from a different country hahahahaha I still don´t know how did I get to read this, but it gives me hope.

    1. oegukeen Avatar

      There are no guarantees :) I was just trying to make a point that women are so certain if only they would lose weight or had blonde hair instead of dark brown or something along those lines, then they could get their perfect guy.

      There are other ways to impress a guy, and I can from my own experience say they work :)

  3.  Avatar
    Anonymous

    why too many people is like K drama? i don’t have idea kdram is suck , yes i am korean guy

    1.  Avatar
      Anonymous

      It is Korean Movie

  4. 김정현 Avatar

    *Before you read it, This is a personal comment of mine even though I wrote down there like they are all Korean guys’ think, you know, it isn’t possible to be having exactly same opinion for all people.

    Well, I’m the Korean guy and I have something to tell you about Korean guy’s thinking for the Foreign girls.

    Actually, I have been living in Morocco for 20 months till now and I’ve got lot of changed thinking for the Foreign girls. (I have been going out with Moroccan girl and had lot of kind of foreign female friends.)

    Before I came to abroad, I mean, When I was in Korea and didn’t know about the out of Korea, actually, there are no many Korean Guys who interested about Foreign girls just like what I’m used to think before. I’m sorry for it. but it is truth. I think this is just because we look too different. (till now, I’m keep asking to my Korean male friends about my foreign female friends that beautiful for me, with their pictures.. but they hardly think they are beautiful enough.) I think, looking different is just good for Korean girls. hhh… You know, so many guys in the world love Korean girls ans the Korean girls love the guys too.

    We(Korean guys) usually think just about Korean girls and the most of Korean guys think that Korean girls are the most beautiful women in the world.

    Of course, I used to think that way too which is I’m not now haha

    And actually, we are well dressed. You know, That’s why you guys think Korean guys are so girly (You can’t say we are girly just because of the our fashion sense! hhhh we are not girly as you think..).. haha and you know what? We think the other guys dress too badly or comfortably.. (I mean, we are just different not wrong)

    So, yeah we actually do care about GF’s fashion. I though I don’t but it turned out I couldn’t help looking my GF’s fashion. as you know, Korean girls’ Fashion is very good and this was what I used look for whole life.

    *I think Korean guys love the girl that look like the Korean girl. this could be just perfect answer for you guys. So if you guys really wanna get Korea guy, keep try to be like them! then you gonna lose your great advantage that Korean girls can hardly get.

    well, as 최다혜 said, we love the “independent” women who can hold themselves high. Witty, humorous, and kind.

    This is also why I like the foreign girls! A decent number of Korean girls want to depend on the men financially. maybe, because they are more difficult to make lot of money than men in Korea.

    And actually we don’t really care if you guys wear too shortly because Korean girls also wear very shortly in Korea.

    Actually, we know you guys have more opened mind than Korean girls(and guys). this is rather could be your advantage to get the Korean guy. We love opened mind girl!

    As for me, I love white-blond hair, blue eyes and the opened mind!! hh
    Korean girls are too sensitive, so it makes us(Korean couple) have a lovers’ quarrel too often. but you guys are so cool! I really love it.
    I think you guys know how to enjoy the life, don’t you?

    1. oegukeen Avatar

      Hi, thank you for sharing your experience. It’s interesting to read a different man’s perspective than Kimchi Man’s.

    2. Nana Avatar
      Nana

      Thank you for your insights ~ I agree with your points about looking the part and keeping up that image for your other half too. Hopefully I can go to Korea and take some of that sense of style back with me (and stock up on my wardrobe)

    3. Successkane Avatar
      Successkane

      Well i agree wit all of you cus the korea guy luv lndependent women . Can i ask a ques do they l ike blacks nana where ar u frm

      1. oegukeen Avatar

        Hi,

        We already answered that questions, please read it here Do Korean men like black women?.

    4. nouhayla Avatar
      nouhayla

      Hey! My name Nouhayla im from Morrocan and im entresst to visite korea and study there So can you please tell me about your expérience i mean bieng forieng?and bdw how did you find my contry and i hope Thatcher u enjoy living here!! :)

    5. vanessa Avatar
      vanessa

      Nice ! ^^
      i Give you Five Star :D

  5. Marina T. 真理菜 (@Mandarince) Avatar
    Marina T. 真理菜 (@Mandarince)

    Personally I find this kind of question(s) weird… I mean, asking for instructions on how to become a certain person in order to get any man to like/love one are weird for me… Actually “be yourself” is the only right and good answer…well, that’s only my opinion.

    1. oegukeen Avatar

      As you can see from our post, we agree with you.

      On the other hand, NO ONE acts the same during the seduction phase as they do later in the relationship.

      1. Marina T. 真理菜 (@Mandarince) Avatar

        What do you mean with “acts the same during the seduction phase as they do later in the relationship”? Could you give me an example please ^^

        1. oegukeen Avatar

          When we want someone to like us, we put our best foot forward. Later in the relationship we relax. I think this is both normal, and a good way to approach a relationship.

          And I guess an example would be how we both brushed our teeth like 20 times a day when we just started our relationship. We’re down to 3 now, and our enamel is grateful ^^
          He used to put on my socks for me every single time we would go out (I have no idea why:) ) and he doesn’t do this any more. I made sure I was always wearing a mascara, and now I skip it most of the days.

          1. Marina T. 真理菜 (@Mandarince) Avatar
            Marina T. 真理菜 (@Mandarince)

            I see what you mean… I was in my very early twenties like that, but not anymore… well, don’t get me wrong, I’m not the harsh, mean version of myself, I believe that it’s only natural to be nice to someone I’ve just met, not only the person you are interested in, but everyone, right?! I think you are with me with this one, but other than that I am still my very own self, straight forward and honest ^^ but not “the best version”.

            Brushing teeth like 20 times? You really did that? Wow (>‿<) lol
            And didn’t you ask him why he put your socks on? Kimchi Man, why did you do that? I’m curious (⌒‿⌒) And why isn’t he doing it anymore? And why don’t you put mascara on anymore? Why did this all change?

          2. oegukeen Avatar

            I’m sure he put my socks on to be helpful and nice. I was just wondering why SOCKS, of all things. I did ask him, but his answer is: Why not? ^^

            Putting a lot of effort into another person isn’t not being yourself, it is showing them they matter to you. When a person falls in love it is a natural reaction to be the best version of ourselves. Even the animals do it. That’s what courting is.

            I believe if a person is not ready to do special things when they meet the special person, then they are not truly in love. But being in this constant state of alertness, unable to relax, for too long would start being exhausting and stop being romantic. Relationships naturally progresses from this chaotic emotionally explosive period. And while it was the most exciting part of my life, I am glad they do.

            Our love hasn’t decreased. Our care for each other hasn’t decreased. On contrary, we love each other more than ever, and he knows exactly what I need and how to care for me. But as we got to know each other better, and as we became more certain that the other person loves us as well, our love became more relaxed. He became my most trusted companion, my deepest support. Our love is not shallow and explosive anymore, it is deep and rumbling.

            Of course, it is also a matter of balance. If we stayed in the initial phase too much, we would burn out and miss out on something profound and special. On the other hand, if the sparks completely disappeared, then we would just be good friends. So I think both is necessary, but in good ratios.

            Also, concerning brushing our teeth and putting socks on, etc. When you first meet a person, you don’t know what they’re like. They could be lazy, unhelpful, dirty… When you’ve know someone for a short time, if they do something bad, you might think that is their personality. If, on the other hand, Kimchi Man would do something bad now (like forget to brush his teeth ^^) I know it’s just a one time thing, and not who he is.

          3. Marina T. 真理菜 (@Mandarince) Avatar
            Marina T. 真理菜 (@Mandarince)

            I’m sure that it was this reason, but I thought it’s maybe something traditional Korean. (⌒‿⌒)

            I agree, when a person >falls in love< putting a lot of effort and starting doing special things, actually doing everything for this person is the natural reaction, but not from the very beginning, unless maybe one believes in love at first sight, which I don’t do. Overall being nice to someone I’ve just met is the natural way to behave, at first, later on it’s a total different story of course.

            Being in this constant state of alertness, unable to relax… I don’t remember that I’ve ever felt that way, so I can’t say anything about it.

            “Our love hasn’t decreased. Our care for each other hasn’t decreased. On contrary, we love each other more than ever, and he knows exactly what I need and how to care for me. But as we got to know each other better, and as we became more certain that the other person loves us as well, our love became more relaxed. He became my most trusted companion, my deepest support. Our love is not shallow and explosive anymore, it is deep and rumbling.”  I think this is how love should develop and I’m of course very happy for you two, that you’ve found each other and that you love each other so much. (⌒‿⌒)

          4. kiki Avatar
  6. 최다해 gongjumonica Avatar
    최다해 gongjumonica

    Cute article. I agree that this is one of the most common questions asked. Even my friends ask me the same question and I’d be like, “Seriously?”

    Even if it’s not about Korean men, there isn’t a concrete answer. I know that the answer “be yourself” won’t satisfy my friends and will instead make them more frustrated.

    You are correct though. Most of my Korean male friends are impressed to meet “independent” women who can hold themselves high. Witty, humorous, and kind.

    1. oegukeen Avatar

      Haha, I’m surprised even you get that question. :)

      Yeah, when they get “be yourself” answer many people tend to think the other person is just too lazy to give them the real answer. But it is really the only true answer. But I figured, as long as you feel doing something, why not work on yourself. :)

Leave a reply to Anonymous Cancel reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Loving Korean

If Korean guy prefers Korean girls do I stand a chance

a place to read about learning Korean language, admiring rich and long Korean culture, and answering your questions about dating Korean guys, written by a diverse group of people. Join us as we have fun and learn about South Korea!

Let’s connect