[Q&A] How to know if a Korean guy likes you?

Published by

oegukeen

April 13, 2012

[Q&A] How to know if a Korean guy likes you?

Having Korean boyfriend has given me a much better insight into Korean culture and customs. I know how to tell Korean age, I know why Korean chopsticks are made of metal, I know there is no such thing as “Sea of Japan”, I know how to address Koreans of different age, I know to handle everything with both hands…

What I don’t know is how to read Korean men’s minds (a pity). I am a bit closer to it with Kimchi Man, but not much.

All the Korean men I have met have been very different and diverse. So has their attitude towards relationships. Some are going to tell you they love you even before they know the color of your eyes, others will not be vocal about their feelings even when they are ready to die for you.

For everyone who is wondering what is the secret to understanding a Korean man’s heart: There is none.

You don’t need to worry that they are sending some secret Korean signal which you are not picking up. Culture has a hard time influencing something as personal and fundamental as love.

How to know if Korean guy likes you - Oppa do you like me 오빠 나 좋아해? That being said, I completely understand what it is like falling in love and having no idea if object of your adoration feels the same way. I was there. We all want to know for sure if we are happily in love or rushing towards heartbreak. That’s why I am going to do my best to help the two women who asked the questions bellow. I just want to make sure everyone understands I would be no more or less qualified to answer those questions even if I had never met a Korean guy in my life.

And if you know a Korean guy, a Korean guy you like, and you don’t know, if this Korean guy you like, likes you back – forget that he’s Korean.

That might just be the thing you need to truly see what he is trying to tell you.

You might also like:


Will a Korean guy be attracted to me?	How does a Korean guy court girls?	Will my Korean man marry me?

Anonymous asked:

I am in love with a Korean guy, we go to the same university and we met when we took the same class about a year ago. I am 19 and he is 21.

I always feel and act very shy, when I am around a person I really like. When there is no him, I am very funny, communicative and totally normal.

I am not Korean (still Asian), and I don’t speak Korean.

The problem is that…He is not a shy one at all, at least he seems to be so. Sometimes when we meet at some university events, we talk, and he seems to like me as a girl, but we never text/chat after that. I mean, we talk only when we see each other. That’s why talking to him is a very rare occasion, because we meet rarely.

The first time I saw him this year after a long period of time, was another university event, he sent an invitation to me on Facebook, which I don’t think was something special or anything, but I decided to go there still. On the day when he sent the invitation, our eyes met at a cafe, when I was walking past him, but I was with my girl friend and he was with a girl friend as well, so I thought: ”Alright, I haven’t seen you for ages, why say Hi then, you probably don’t even remember me”. He didn’t wave hi to me either. So yeah, then BOOM I got that invitation, and I decided to go. Cause I thought that accidental meeting had something to do with the invitation.

When I just got there, he came up first saying ”Ooh, it’s been a long time” and hugged me, which was a bit weird, because we are not that close friends at all, till that time, we probably had a talk for a couple of times, not more. I mean, I’m not that kind of friend of his, who he could miss. We were never close at all. But I think at the moment when he hugged me, I clearly understood that I liked him a lot. I knew I liked him before, but I thought it was not serious.

I met him the second time about a couple days ago at a university event as well. There were very few people there, but he took the time to come up to me and talk and I tried to act as normal and funny as I could, but I was burning inside and shaking and all that… in the end he said that he’d like to attend an event of mine (I’m the president of a student group) so I promised to send him an invitation.

Everything seems to be okay, but I don’t understand, why he is so passive, if he likes me. Does it mean, that he doesn’t like me as a girl, but just being friendly? He never sends me messages or anything like that… I am hesitating to message him, cause I’m afraid I would never get a reply…and I think that a guy must make the first moves. And if he doesn’t, then it means he’s not interested, in my opinion. I would understand, if he was a shy one, but… as i said before he’s not. He’s very friendly and communication is not a problem for him.

And the second problem is that I don’t know for sure if he has a girlfriend or not. However, the Facebook status says Single otherwise, the last thing I would want to do is ruin a relationship…

Also, I thought about the problem, that I am not Korean, and I thought about the possibility, that he is not interested in me as a girl, because I’m not Korean.

Also, I think it’s worth mentioning that he’s kind of Americanized Korean. He has been living in the USA for about 5 years I believe. But he almost always hangs out with Korean friends.

anyways..please heeeeeeelp

I don’t think that the guy has to make the first move. Why would he? Maybe he is shy when it comes to asking girls out, maybe he is passive, maybe he sees you only as a friend, maybe he already has a girlfriend… You could go all day long guessing “maybes” if you don’t do something about it.

Even if he sees you just as a friend, making the first move might make him see you in a different light.

It’s never easy being rejected but Facebook and text messaging have certainly made it a lot easier than it used to be. You don’t need to pour your heart out to him, just ask him: “Do you want to go out for a coffee/movie/walk”. If he says yes, there is a very good chance he likes you as a girl :)

I have no idea if he has a girlfriend or if he is a national chauvinist. Since he is human, both are possible. Koreans I know have no problem dating someone who is not Korean, and in my case not even Asian. Many questions we got on this site are from Asian non-Korean women who are dating a Korean man, so obviously not all Koreans have a problem with it.

And why wouldn’t you want to ruin his relationship? You are 19, and 21! It’s not like he is married with children and you are tearing apart a family. If you asking him out is enough to ruin his relationship then that relationship deserves to be ruined. I was in a relationship when I met Kimchi Man and I am much happier now. On the other hand, no matter who come to my doorstep now, no one can take me away from Kimchi Man.

You should know that if I didn’t make the first move, Kimchi Man would never dare do it himself (maybe not never but my guess is it would take him 10 years or so ^^). And he was very interested in me. If you keep thinking a girl shouldn’t make the first move, another one will come along who thinks differently and snatch this guy right under your nose.

Ching asked:

Hi…

I’m half Chinese half Filipino girl but my family and I moved to Phil for good when I was still young.. I am now 22 years old, and I met this Korean guy last year almost 9 months ago.. well, I just really feel so alone about this so I hope you can help me out.. here’s my story..

9 months ago July 2011 to be exact I applied in a Korean school in our city, I was accepted and first week in school I had only 2 students and one of the two was the guy I fell in love with. At that time I was 21 and he’s 25 I think. At first I dont really feel anything for him, just the teacher-student relationship. I also noticed he was this shy type of guy, first 2 weeks with him he barely talked. But after about 4 weeks we just got close and I dunno how it happened. But after that he started teasing me everytime we see each other in the hallway, he’s calling me vampire and i’m calling him werewolf. A lot of teasing and all. And then one time during class he asked me who I like then I told him I like Lee Seung Gi [korean actor] then he repeated that question again and I answered him same answer I gave him before then after than he start acting like his heart is in pain [physically] at first I dunno what does that action means but my friend told me he might be hurt that it wasnt him that I like and so he started acting that in a joke way so it wont be obvious.. then he also asked if I do have a boyfriend that time and I said no and he told me that I must get a boyfriend, and I also mentioned to him that I have a curfew around 7pm and he told me that my boyfriend might want to be with me more than my curfew time.. what does that mean??

and sometimes he’ll notice what I’m wearing like last time when I was wearing a coat and I just passed by him he really asked me isnt your coat thick? dont u feel hot? and one time when I had a new student and he’s kinda good looking and almost same age with me, he started asking questions like, So are you happy that the good looking new student is in your class?… who’s better me or him? – those kind of questions and I dunno why he’s asking me like that..

and one of my friend in that school was also his tutor.. so whenever he’ll have class with that friend of mine he would usually asked her to call me and let me go inside their room while they’re having class and it happened many times, i was just there listening to their conversation and whenever I decided to move out the room he would usually stop me and say Vampire where are you going? just stay here.

or sometimes when we meet each other in the hallway he would blocked my way and wont let me pass and he’d tell me Touch me first before I let you pass.. and you know this kind of actions he’s showing me made me fell for him I think.. fell harder that I dont even know how to get out of this situation..

and during his birthday I gave him a not Happy Birthday Werewolf! and he took a picture of it and upload it in his fb..

he also challenged me one time to play snake and ladder with him and he told me if he wins I wont give him assignments for 1 week and if i win he wont complain even if I give him assignments everyday.. its the first time that I have ever played that game and it was with him, so I treasure it a lot (:

what do you think his actions mean?? does it mean something? does he like me?

ah, a day after his birthday he informed all his tutors that he will be absent for the whole day because last night he got drunk and hangover the next morning.. so I was expecting that he’ll also be absent in my class but I was surprised when he entered my room that day.. so I asked him Why are u here? I thought you’d be absent the whole day and he said I was thinking that if I wont come here you’ll be alone here. I was so touched when he told me that but ofcourse I act as if its nothing… and then 1 week after that he was removed in my class and so I started to feel like I was left hanging, a lot of questions are running into my head.. my friends were telling me that he must be afraid that he’d fall for me and so on…

what I did was I tried to talk to him again, initiate the conversation first but I can feel this change like it’s not the way it was back before.. we dont talk that much anymore unlike before when he was still in my class.. we passed by each other in the hallway without even saying hi.. I asked him he doesnt talked to me anymore, he said He was shy. I tried everything to gain back the friendship we once had the closeness we once had… but I think I falied or maybe I didnt try harder? I was asking myself What should I do? but later on I just stopped trying to talk to him just trying to accept that maybe it wasnt meant to be.. September that year we stopped talking, offcially. February this year he went back to korea without talking to me. He had my number. This march a friend of mine who is also his friend told me that he has a kakaotalk so why not try to add him. So I added him and again I have to initiate the talking.. we talked and he told me he misses me but overjoyed about his message i wasnt able to reply to him right away and then he sent me a message again saying he was just kidding with the ‘haha’ … what does that mean???! I hate him but still I believe he meant it when he told me he misses me.. what do u think? Now, I decided to just stop talking to him stop initiating just to talk to him cause its always me who texts first maybe he really doesnt care at all so why would I waste my time with him…

please help me what to do is my decision right?

I badly need your opinion guys.. I hope you can help me out with this..

sorry I think I wrote too long, its just that if i skipped a few lines u might not be able to get my situation.. kinda a long story (:

he’s still single until now and he told me before that he once had a girlfriend 4 years ago…

hoping to get a reply from you soon ^^ thanks ~

I employed help from Kimchi Man on this one. He says guy obviously liked you before but something changed. You can’t know what changed and to obsess about it would just be wasting your time. Since he is in Korea and your interactions are just one-way, you made a good decision.

Your friends are trying to protect your feelings when they say he is just afraid he will fall in love with you. Unless there is some specific obstacle you know – like policy in your school that students and teachers can’t be in a relationship (although now that he’s not in school that argument became moot) – why would he be afraid of liking you?

Stick to your decision and don’t waste your time on this Korean guy. Maybe he will come around and contact you, but chances are very slim.

-Oegukeen

Leave your question in the comments below if you still don’t know if Korean guy likes you. :)

Also recommended:

How to get a Korean guy to like you

324 responses to “[Q&A] How to know if a Korean guy likes you?”

JYL

April 1, 2013

I am an Asian.. And i met this Korean guy one’s, together with my cousin.. He is studyin’ English her in the Philippines And he said that he wants to meet people to have many friends.. We go out..We had a fun and nice conversation..We laughed together and we shared food together.. He is a kind man and gentleman.. He also accompanied us at my place.. Then he texted me that night.. Sayin’ he is happy and confident enough.. And i replied I had fun.. I knew that time that I really liked him..Then mornin’ comes i texted him.. But he never reply.. Next 2 days, no text at all.. And I feel that I am hurtin’. And then the next day its his birthday, and ofcourse i texted him birthday greetings.. And He did reply.. He said “I’m really happy to know you. Good night and see you soon”.. And i replied the next day.. Thats the last time I texted him.. Til now we haven’t talk.. And his always on my mind and sometimes thinkin’ bout him alot causes me insomniac.. And I always askin’ my self why cant he like me.. What should I do? Help me fix my problem.. :((((((((((((((((((((((((((

Reply
1. oegukeen
  
  April 6, 2013
  
  Hello JYL,
  
  I’m sorry you are in such an unhappy situation, but we really can’t help you. We can’t make him like you, and we really don’t know why he’s not texting you back.
  
  Reply
Adrianna

March 11, 2013

Hi! I read your blog, and I am very interested. I like a Korean guy. We attend the same college, but we do not take the same courses. He is a music major while I am a business major. We met half a year ago by coincidence/chance. I was sitting on the floor doing my homework. My class got cancelled and my next one was in 2 hours. I saw him get off the elevator and I noticed how handsome he was. I returned to doing my homework but I saw him go around the whole floor and seemed lost. He turned around a second time and finally stood standing next to me. He asked “What are you doing?” Which I wanted to reply “shouldn’t I be asking you that?” But I just said “homework” from there he asked to sit next to me. He was waiting for a friend. We talked and other students knew him and he introduced them to me. When he was going to leave he said “You seem like a nice girl and I like our conversations, can I get your number?” So I gave him my number. I didn’t see him after that. A week later he texted me. Then he asked to have lunch with him, and I agreed. While having lunch he asked me if we could play a game. It was Truth or Pass (Dare couldn’t be done since we were in a restaurant) he wanted to ask questions to each other to feel more comfortable and know more of each other. I asked him “why did you talk to me?” To which he responded “I thought you were cute” I felt happy but I just said “ah okay”. We have talked to each other more now, I do usually seem to text him first or message him on Facebook, but when I do we have long conversations. He also told me he hates texting or talking on the phone. That if it was possible for him not to have one he wouldn’t. So I don’t take it wrong. I wanted to shim my interest in him by being subtle. Every two weeks at 5:20pm (his break and just 10 min before my class starts) on Wesnesday I give him something sweet, like a cupcake, cake, cake pops, and tell him to be well. He always textes me how much he loves what I give him and that he will buy me something in return. He tooked me out for dinner 2 weeks ago, and just last week I have him cake pops to which he responded a couple days later that every time he sees dessert it remind him of me.
He isn’t the shy type, and I am. This is why he approached me first. I don’t usually start conversations. I don’t see that he has feelings for me. He hugs me when we say good bye but I don’t see this strange. He is friendly with me but that’s all. He doesn’t have a girlfriend but I do notice on his Facebook that he hangs out with a Vietnamese girl. They seem to know each other from a long time.
I am 20 years old, skinny, 5’4, medium beige, Mexican-American. He is 23 years old and has lived in the Stated for a little over 7years, his family is in Korea.
Any help?

Reply
1. oegukeen
  
  March 27, 2013
  
  What do you need help with?
  
  Choosing the right make up and style for your body type? Haha :) Why else would you describe your looks in such detail?
  
  Please don’t think that skin color and cultural background are so important. He’s just a guy, and you’re just a girl. It’s really simple.
  
  Reply
Mouse

March 11, 2013

About a month ago the super cute korean fitness trainer at the fitness center I go to asked me for some drinks. We had been making eye contact and small talk for weeks before he finally asked me out. It turned into a romantic dinner. Afterwards he asked if I wanted to go to a DVD room or a karaoke room. At the time I was very naive an didn’t know that DVD rooms ACTUALLY mean something else. I thought at first it was a movie theater and his english was just off. I chose te DVD room merely because I was just getting to know him and I wasn’t confident to let him hear me sing karaoke (haha). Anyways, we went to the DVD room and he got as you would imagine all touchy touchy! I had to ask him to keep his distance several times (he was the first foreign guy I dated- so I wanted to be as cautious as possible obviously. Plus I don’t do one night stands). He kept on telling me how much he like me. Then that night he sent me a kakao saying how he was very happy. The next two weeks though when I went to the gym he completely ignored me! As if I didn’t exist! I didn’t understand until a friend explaine to me what a DVD room implied. Now, for the past few weeks he has been making small talk in the gym and smiling at me. The problem is I have fallen for him. He isn’t making a move though, so is there hope? Is there maybe a way I could make sure he knows I like him? Do you think his confidence was hurt so he is afraid? Honestly I’m new to the whole dating world so I just have no idea what happened! How he went from “I really like you” to ignoring me. Thanks for your help, I really appreciate it!

Reply
1. Mouse
  
  March 14, 2013
  
  Oh, and I want to make it clear that at the date he said “he really liked me” then for 2 weeks he ignored me and now for the past two weeks he has become very friendly and we are having small talk again.
  
  Reply
2. Kimchi Man
  
  March 26, 2013
  
  It’s just cultural misunderstanding, but I think anyone who gets “back off” many times will not be bold enough to ask again.
  
  If you didn’t get bad opinion about him and want to, you can make the first move now.
  
  Reply
Anonymous

March 10, 2013

Hi there! This site has been very helpful to me so far, thank you to both yourself and your husband!

I, of course, am a bit worried about romance with Korean boys too. I’ve always had a stronger attraction to Asian men and women and their cultures, and I’ve been lucky enough to befriend two Korean exchange students at my school- one older (though in my grade), and one younger (a year below).

We meet through a mutual friend (my close Chinese friend- the Asian population in our school seem to cling together), and I found out that one of them even lives directly by my house, and we get off at the same bus stop together.

We’ve been talking more frequently as of recent (both of them), which is nice, because I really love to talk about the cultural differences. Once, on our way home, the one who lives by me asked if I wanted to go to the bank and coffee shop with him, which of course, I accepted. He bought me a drink (later on I returned the favour) and we went to our homes. I do seem to make him laugh a lot, and he teases me (and I him) and waves in the halls.

He also has given me compliments, though, but I think they might be just out of courtesy. We talked about hair, and how I wanted to cut/dye mine (it’s quite an unusual mix of colours), but he said he liked it (even though I thought it was terrible)! Like I said, it could have just been out of courtesy, but I did feel a little bit of a flutter.

I feel like I’m starting to develop a little crush on him, but I’m oh-so-nervous that it will be one-sided. Both he and our friend are very teasing, and since I lack self-confidence around those I find to be interesting/impressive, I worry that I might be having a bit of a mockery made of me. I’m just starting to learn Korean (I know only hangul at the moment), so when they speak to each other around me, I do get nervous that that might be the case.

The second of the two is a lot more teasing, so I feel if any negativity was present that the majority of it might be from him. Although he has asked me to take the bus with him a few times (which I only realized when I happened to take the bus he suggested after school and he was on it). And once he mentioned going out to the fantastic Japanese place a minute from the bus terminal, but I think he might have been joking. I had made a non-answering comment out of fear of being teased for believing he actually wanted to go and eat. Once again, I felt it may be more for teasing than actual friendship!

I feel bad that I’m so worried I’m being made fun of, but I can’t help it. I guess I’m just too intimidated! But I do seem to make both of them genuinely laugh (I tend to have a great sense of humour), so I can’t be too sure.

Any thoughts? I don’t want to fall for either of them in the case that I’ll just end up embarrassing myself, but the one-on-one post-bus hangouts throw me a little.

Sorry for writing an entire novel, haha. I hope to hear your opinion soon!

Reply
1. Anonymous
  
  March 10, 2013
  
  Oh, and I forgot- at one point when we (the one who lives near me) went out he forgot I don’t understand Korean, and excitedly tried to show me something his brother had texted him. When I responded with an awkward “I can’t read that?” he laughed for a good five minutes or so, which was positively adorable. I don’t think this is very relevant, but I wanted to share anyway, haha.
  
  Reply
  1. oegukeen
    
    March 11, 2013
    
    Hello,
    
    We’re not married, but you’re welcome anyway :)
    
    I’ve been around people who don’t speak my language a lot. And I know it can often seem what they are saying is either targeted against you or something really interesting that you are missing. But trust me, everyday conversations are so mundane you should feel grateful you don’t understand everything.
    
    However, if your friends were raised in South Korea, then they were taught to be very midful of other people’s feelings, so you might try simply explaining to them that their teasing hurts you.
    
    On the other hand, are you sure you really like this guy? Saying “I don’t want to fall for either of them…” makes it almost sound as if you don’t care which one of them it is.
    
    Reply
    1. Anonymous
      
      March 11, 2013
      
      Oh! I’m horribly sorry, the way you spoke of your interactions together gave me that impression. I shouldn’t have assumed anything, I hope I haven’t offended you!
      
      That is true, I’ll keep it in mind! They have both been living in Canada for about two years now at least, however, so I don’t know how much of our culture’s standards they might have adapted. The teasing doesn’t hurt me so much as worries/confuses me, because I have the tendency to fear whether or not people might actually be my friend or not. But that’s a whole other matter, haha.
      
      I did think it might have sounded like that when I typed it, so I suppose I should explain myself! I’m trying to hold myself back from having feelings for anyone out of fear of ridicule/rejection, but both of them have displayed qualities that I find endearing. What I mean by that is I find both of them very interesting and attractive (personality-wise and physically), although the feelings that I’m trying to push back (once again, due to that fear) are leaning strongly towards he who lives closer to me. I can only hope you’ve been in a situation before where you have found two men to be appealing enough to spark an interest (at the same time) so you can understand what I mean!
      
      (Also, I feel awkward referring to them with words such as “the one”, as it feels I’m objectifying them, but please know I’m only doing so as to not use their names and keep this anonymous as possible!)
      
      Sorry for any way I might have come off!
      
      Reply
      1. oegukeen
        
        March 11, 2013
        
        Of course it’s not offensive to assume we are married. I just think it’s funny that he is often getting called my husband. Internet has married us it seems ^^
        
        To be honest, I haven’t really found two guys appealing at the same time. I am very picky and always find something annoying about the guy. That’s why my boyfriend is the first man I really fell in love with, which I think makes it even more special. :)
        
        But that’s just my unpleasant personality, and it doesn’t mean you are doing something wrong or that I can’t understand why you feel the way you feel.
        
        Maybe I don’t know enough about the situation, but it seems to me the only problem you have is your own insecurities. You either need to deal with that or ask them nicely to stop teasing you.
alexa

March 6, 2013

Hi. Nice blog.

I may need your opinion in a situation i’m in now though.

I just came back from Korea yesterday. I have finally met this Korean friend that I have been chatting with everyday for almost a year now.

So first meeting was at the airport while he was waiting for me. We shook hands then he grabbed my luggage and carried it until we checked in for our flight to Jeju. Because it’s my first time to travel with a man, he reserved 2 rooms- 1 for me and the other for him and another friend. When we had meals, he would always get something from my plate or finished eating the food when i couldn’t. He also shared his and always asked me to try his food. He always ordered just 1 drink which we would both share (which i’m not really used to because this is normally done by couples in my country). He held my head a couple of times and sometimes played at it. He would ask me to touch his face sometimes too to show me that he was feeling warm after a long walk. He would also offer to carry my handbag which i sometimes refused because it’s not something heavy at all. He also once massaged my upper back and head and asked me to do the same for him which i failed (i’m not good at it kkk) after we did snowboarding. Because he had to help me stand up every time i fell when we were snowboarding, he grabbed my right hand and asked me to promise him that i would go on a diet and stop eating chocolates and ice cream.

He would always say that he knows me well and even boasted it to his friends. He sometimes checked my phone as he knows the password. In Seoul, he would always send me to my guesthouse (he stayed at his brother’s place) and even mentioned that he has never done this to his ex-girlfriends. Ahh i forgot, upon arrival he showed me all his identification cards. He also did open my wallet, checked my IDs and got one of the ID pictures i have kept inside. He said he is going to keep as he normally has photos of his friends in his wallet but he just showed me photos of his 2 ex-gfs.

Sorry for the long story…i was just confused with all his gestures though. I am not sure if he likes me or he was just acting too friendly.

He is coming to Singapore in July and is very excited about it.

Did i just misinterpret his actions? ^^

Alexa

Reply
1. oegukeen
  
  March 9, 2013
  
  It does sound as if he likes you, but you shouldn’t like him.
  
  I may be misinterpreting what happened but this man sounds very controling. I don’t know if you gave him permission to do all these things you mentioned (if you did, you shouldn’t have), but if he did all this on his own accord: checked your phone, opened your vallet and took a photo out of it, and told you to go on a diet, he doesn’t sound like someone you can have a happy and rewarding relationship with.
  
  Reply
  1. alexa
    
    March 10, 2013
    
    About the wallet and the phone, well i didn’t really mind because i also share the password to my friends if they need to check something, most of the time just photos. He as well was just checking the photos. And the wallet, i just laid it in the table but in fairness to him, he did ask if he can open it but i was just not expecting he’ll take one of my photos there. Then about me losing weight, i kinda agree to him though coz i really did gain a lot for the past 2-3 years and i think i am overweight now. He said though when he asked me to go on a diet that it’s for my own good.
    
    But yeah sometimes i do notice he’s a little controlling but i think maybe because of the nature of his work as he is on a higher rank in the navy. He still did ask me though about my opinions and considerate enough to ask me where i would like to go or what type of food i like to eat when i was there especially i cannot really take very spicy food.
    
    Just a question though, is it normal in Korea for a man and woman to share food or maybe for a guy to feed a friend who’s a girl? Or share the same glass of drink like soda?
    
    In my country, the way acted was like he’s my boyfriend but i’m not sure if it’s common in Korea. He’s never told me he likes me though but sometimes in our conversation he mentions the only words he learned from my language which means i love you and acts sometimes he forgets the meaning so that i could translate for him in english or korean, though he’s the type of person who remembers everything i’ve told him from the beginning.
    
    Thanks so much for your time to read my story and share your opinion about it. I really appreciate it.
    
    Reply
    1. oegukeen
      
      March 11, 2013
      
      Well, if you are comfortable with his controling behavior, that’s all that really matters.
      
      I don’t think it is abnormal to share food with your friend. If you mean, is it a sure sign that a man and a woman are more than friends, no it’s not. Only sure sign is if they start kissing or more.
      
      As I said already, from what you told me, it does seem to me like he wants to be more than friends with you. However, there isn’t one specific isolated signal that he is giving to you to tell you this. It is his behavior every time he is around you that is supposed to let you know.
      
      Reply
      1. Anonymous
        
        April 7, 2013
        
        thank you for the time you spent in reading my story and sharing your opinion.
  2. alexa
    
    March 10, 2013
    
    I forgot to mention too, he also let me open and use his phone and also sometimes ask me to hold his wallet for him because he let me use his credit card’s T money for the subway and bus.
    
    Reply
Anonymous

February 25, 2013

This site has been very informative, thanks! I need some opinions/advice if possible; I met a Korean guy almost a month ago at a club. He found and added me on facebook that night and then arranged to meet 2 days later. We have met once a week since first meeting. We have so much chemistry, he asks a lot of questions about me and laughs at all my jokes and silly things I do. He is always very excited when we find common ground and interests and he is very eager to keep meeting. Any new place or thing I mention he says ‘show me/take me/let’s go together!’. He even asked on the first meeting if we can go to go to Disneyland Paris together in July, after finding out that we are both obsessed with Disney.
He really wants to get married and have a family, he asked me on our first meeting if I liked/wanted children and when we went to the Disney store on the second meeting he got me to look at all the baby stuff with him..for about 30 minutes!
When meeting, I always initiated a hug (which I have now found out to be the wrong thing to do!) no wonder he was as stiff as a board when it happened, but then after the first and last meeting we had, he initiated the hug when saying goodbye. He also sent me a text message after we last met when I was on my way home, saying thank you for the night and that I was really kind.
He’s never paid for the meal but last time he went in front of me to pull my chair out and asked me if he could try my food and he also offered me food from his plate.
The problem is, he never initiates conversation on facebook or text message, it’s always me. I was thinking that he wasn’t interested in me, but maybe he just isn’t comfortable typing in English.
When we meet up, he holds eye contact all the time and looks deep in to my eyes, whenever he isn’t looking at my eyes, he is looking at another part of my face. He also uses different ways to touch me, touching my rings, handing me things, play punching me and getting me to feel his bicep haha.
I really like him and feel chemistry but I don’t know what to do, just keep meeting and see how it goes? Would he make the first *move* if he liked me? or do I need to show a clear interest in him/say something? He isn’t afraid of asking to meet so I will just go with the flow. We are always smiling and laughing from start to finish when we meet, I feel very comfortable and at ease around him.
The other issue is, his visa expires in a few months, he has applied to study at university here..but I don’t know if he will get the place. I don’t know if he would want to bother getting involved with someone if he was unsure of his future here.
He is an actor/dance and I am worried that he is just a bit of a flirt and likes the attention.
Any help would be greatly appreciated! I’ve just got over my last boyfriend of 4 years and I really don’t want to get hurt again..yet this new guy is like a magnet so I can’t walk away.

Reply
1. oegukeen
  
  February 25, 2013
  
  There’s no way of getting involved in love without the risk of getting hurt.
  
  I can’t tell you for sure what your guy is thinking, but my Korean boyfriend didn’t make the first move, and didn’t initiate conversations. But he’s very shy and quiet with everyone, not just me, so that was my clue that it’s a reflection of his personality and not his feelings towards me.
  
  He gave me compliment and treated me really nicely so that encouraged me to risk it and tell him I fell in love with him.
  
  I would rather be with him all the time than be in a long-distance relationship but I would also rather be in a long-distance relationship with him, than without him at all. So you need to make up your mind if this guy is worth it for you.
  
  It worked out great for me, and I hope it works out the way you want for you.
  
  Reply
2. Anonymous
  
  September 11, 2013
  
  hello! excuse but to me the exact same thing is happening … I have your same doubt …. I do I forward, continuing to write first? I have to wait for him? how you behaved? please would you give me any suggestions? thanks
  
  Reply

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